


The Edge of Legend

by MaderaCain



Category: Original Work
Genre: Explicit Language, Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2019-12-13
Packaged: 2021-01-15 18:44:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 34,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21257903
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MaderaCain/pseuds/MaderaCain
Summary: On the run for so long running from a group of very powerful people, he seeks the ones who set him up and framed him for the destruction of his civilization.  Teaming up with unlikely people who share his views, he moves closer to finding out who the traitor in the Collective is.





	1. The End of the Line

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for taking the time to read my story. Let's jump right in!

Another dogfight? Why? All I want is to live my life the way I want. Live where I want. Love who I want. There never seems to be a good time to say this but maybe there isn’t supposed to be. This time I’m gonna die. This time they’ve got me. Their tech is better than mine and their AI is smarter than me. They know what I’m gonna do before I do it seems. Oh shit I’m gonna die. The missiles are right there and I missed, I couldn’t shoot them down. How did I miss? Oh galaxy this sucks. I thought that would work. What the hell? Fine then, let’s go. I know my ship is faster than most. Their AI has probably figured that out already. Pull up, punch it. Go go go, gotta go now. Faster. Faster goddamn it. Gotta shake the last two missiles. They’re aimed at the cockpit otherwise I’d already be dead. Can’t slow down, not yet. Come on go faster for me. Faster, please. A debris field? Asteroid dust maybe? Can’t I use it? Don’t care, gotta try. Spin to try and shake off the missiles. Now any small asteroids nearby? Anything I can blow up to make it harder for them? Oh shit, looks like they already destroyed all the asteroids. Damn them. Damn me. Damn me for thinking I could hide. Hide here on this planet. I just want to live my life. What’s the point now? What’s the point when the only people I can trust are gone? I’m going to teach these bastards about my resolve. Where is their ship? My last action will be to prove my resolve. I need to find their ship. Why isn’t it showing up on my radar? There it is, next to the moon. Half way around the planet. Alright here I go. It’s time for my final attack run. Time to finally live the way I want. And die the way I want. Not the way they want. Never their way.

On my approach, I get a strange feeling so I switch on my communicator. The switch sticks from disuse. I hear the loud crackle of power coming into the speaker as it makes a connection and a voice can be heard.

“…down. Stand down now or we will be forced to destroy your ship,” says the voice.

Another voice, “I told you. He won’t respond. He’s not the type to surrender and I’m fine with that. He’s going to die here and now, finally and there’s nothing he can do about it.”

“If he is going to die then he deserves the chance to give his last words. I don’t care what you have against him or what he has done to deserve this manhunt but I am the Commander of this ship and I will listen if he is willing to speak,” the first voice sounds almost pleading. The strength in those words and voice sends a shock through me.

“I’m willing to speak to one who is willing to listen,” my voice cracks and I realize how dry my throat is. “My name-“

“We know who you are, rebel scum,” comes the second voice. “We’ve come to stop your rampage and destroy you!”

“Enough! If he is willing to speak then I will listen. I am Commander-“

“No names are necessary. I apologize but that idiot is right. You know who I am and that’s all anyone ever thinks that matters. That’s fine with me. I’ve given up on trying to change people’s minds and now have only one final thing to say.”

“Very well, I understand now what drives you. What is it you wish to say?” the Commander calmly asks.

“Well maybe two things. If we had met in a different time and place I think I could’ve liked you. But that’s neither here nor there so moving on. I understand you all think you know who I am and have your own thoughts about me. The murderer of who got away. The destroyer without a conscience. I’m pretty sure I’ve heard them all. So you send people after me to be struck down by my hand and to prove my evilness. To prove I’m a monster. A monster that will go to any length to destroy those near me. Let me put your minds at ease. I am just a man who is fighting for what he believes is right. Always have been and will be until my last breathe. Nothing will ever change that. Not the fact that I arrived at my home to find it in ruins, with only the hope that my family weren’t inside. That’s what sparked my rebellion by the way. I heard the attack came from space without warning and when I left to find out why, I was branded a murderer that fled the planet. When I returned to my planet I found it without a single building standing. Everything was leveled to the ground so when the pursuit ship arrived and claimed I destroyed everything I lost it. I was being set up and no one cared. No one had the time to listen to my side of the story.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” says the Commander. “And so you’ve been running ever since. Why may I ask have you decided to speak to us now? Why are you telling me this? You can escape just like you have in the past. Surely you’re not giving up?”

“Ha-ha no I am most certainly not giving up. I’m just tired of running and needed someone to hear my side of the story.”

“Then you must not think you can get away this time. I understand why you don’t want to surrender. The reason is because you feel you won’t be treated properly am I right?”

“No that’s not it. Though I wish that could be the answer it’s much more complicated than all that,” I sigh. “It’s-“

“A matter of pride. That makes sense. I pride myself on not losing a single one of my crew on any mission and you pride yourself on the way you live your life,” the Commander almost sounds sympathetic.

“Careful Commander, don’t tell me your thinking of letting me go.”

“Ha-ha not a chance! I will however consider keeping you alive.”

“Well I regret to inform you that the first ship I encountered on the planet I destroyed. My apologies for ending your streak of no losses. And I commend you for holding other’s lives in such high esteem. But as to the priding myself on the way I live my life, I’m gonna have to ask. What life do you think I live? I was happy once but now I’m just trying to survive. I don’t have a life anymore. My life ended the day I returned home and found it destroyed. I never even got to look for the bodies of my… my… _God I hate old memories, they always have a way of cracking me._ No I don’t live my life, I don’t live anymore. I survive and just barely I might add. No, my last action as a living person will be to-“

Laughing from the Commander stops my voice. “The first ship you encountered was a drone ship. Unmanned and flown remotely. I must say though, you did try very hard not to shoot the ship directly. It seems I’m not the only one to hold life in such high esteem. Not only would a pilot in that ship have survived your attack I could have still sent you a lethal blow as the ship was not damaged enough to cripple it. As soon as you took out the engine your attention went to finding a way out of the structure,” the Commander laughs a little more.

I was shocked, “Does that mean you let me go? Why didn’t you fire at me? You’re supposed to be trying to stop me at any cost right? So why?”

The laughing stops. After a moment the Commander says, “Because I do things differently. And I saw how hard you tried to not hit the cockpit of my ship. I didn’t see a criminal, I saw a man who wanted to escape without killing to achieve his survival. A man like that deserves the chance to be heard. The chance to explain things.”

“But you must have heard the stories of no contact right? So why tr-”

“Why try to listen when I had no guarantee of speaking to you? Like I said, I do things differently. By the way if you don’t want those missiles to catch up you should probably speed back up.”

“Shit!” my shock had made my grip loosen on the throttle. The missiles now only meters away are angling towards my cockpit. Gripping the throttle harder I manage to pull away slightly. “I must admit, I didn’t expect to be warned about those, and by you least of all.”

“Like I said before, I do things differently. However it seems our conversation is coming to a close soon, should we get back to it? May I ask a question? Why run when you had done nothing wrong?”

“That was three questions but the last one is a valid one so to answer it I must ask a question of my own. Is your government flawless? Are any of the members power hungry? Would I have been given a fair trial while everyone had already made up their minds about me?”

Silence met my ears. For a moment I thought my communicator stopped working until, “No, yes and probably not.”

“Then why would I give myself up?”

I want so bad to turn off the communicator but before I could make up my mind I heard, “What are you waiting for? Just kill him! What’s the point in listening to his lies?”

“Because he isn’t lying. Why would a man on his final attack run lie? He doesn’t see a way out of this situation and wants his voice to be heard even if by deaf ears.”

“Final attack run huh? Then you really do understand me more than I thought. More than you let on. I’ve changed my mind. I’d like to exchange names. My name is Rycon.”

“I am Commander Eliralazaraz. I am honored to meet you, Rycon. Too bad it’s not under better circumstances. You are an amazing pilot and I wish to extend my deepest condolences for everything that has happened to you.”

“Wow. Honor, praise and sympathy all at the same time. I suppose this truly is my last run. How can I possibly hope to beat someone of your caliber?”

“Sarcasm in the face of danger, I like it. But what do you mean my caliber? Are you speaking of my rank?”

“No of course not. Your rank has no bearing on my opinion. Well maybe a little,” I let out a sigh. I’m so tired all of a sudden. “I am talking about your willingness to listen, to keep your people safe, and your ability to see more than what is right in front of you. It’s rare to find someone with your strength. If I am to die then I’m happy it’s to someone like you and not that idiot on the line with you.” The ship is close now. I can see the lights of the command deck. I’d hate to take someone like this Commander with me but I don’t see any other way. “By the way, does your name mean anything?”

“What?”

“Does your name mean anything? Like strength or power or something like that.”

“Strength or power?”

“Or something like that,” the surprise in the Commander’s voice told me the question has never come up.

“I don’t know. I’ve never checked,” now some irritation mingles with the surprise.

“Don’t worry about it. I don’t know if mine does either. It’s an interesting surname though.”

“That’s not a surname. That’s my name.”

“Oh I’m sorry. I didn’t realize. I guess I just assumed-“

“Just assumed like everyone else that I have a feminine last name? No it’s a first name, why would you assume that I’m a man?”

“Well my speaker isn’t very good, likes to crackle a lot. So I didn’t catch the voice well. Sorry I meant no disrespect. It’s a nice name. So Commander Ellie, I believe you know the only two outcomes to this encounter. You kill me or I escape. I’m fond of the latter option so let’s at least keep that on the table ok?”

“Uh… wha… What did you just call me? Who do you think you are?”

“Yeah I know we just met but it’s easier for me to say and I’d rather not butcher your name. It would be disrespectful as my parents would say. ‘If you can’t say the name properly then don’t say it at all.’ Well I suppose that would include short names huh? Oops sorry I should have asked your permission first. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a good conversation so I’m sure I’ve screwed up a few times here.” Silence. “Hello? Did my communicator really stop working now of all times?” I heave a sigh and look up at the stars. “Great. Sorry mom. I finally met someone I can respect and I screwed it up pretty bad. I guess this it, no more running.”

I can now see some of the people standing on the command deck. The Commander is standing near the front of the deck looking out at me. I can’t make out her expression, not yet. I can see people running from the windows, I can almost hear their screams. My mind flashes back to my home.

_I wonder how much warning they had. The horrible burn marks on the ground. The craters made by giant explosions. The wood of the home my family has owned for genera-_

“You really are an idiot aren’t you?” The voice surprised me so much that I pulled the stick back so hard my ship begins to spin out of control. With a loud bang I hear something hit my engines. My whole ship shudders and everything goes black with one thought on my mind, _Great, made a fool of myself in my final moments. Wonderful. At least I lost to someone like her._

***


	2. I'm Alive?

***

Beep... beep... beep. The sound of the alarm clock is so annoying to hear when first waking up. Trying to ignore it I squeeze my eyes shut harder. My bed is stiff and uncomfortable making it hard to sleep.

_Wait, my bed?_

My eyes flash open to see a blinding light above me. Closing my eyes again in pain I try to lift my hand to rub them while tears drip down the side of my face but can’t. My wrists feel like they are bound to the bed. My breathing is difficult and painful.

_What the hell is going on? Where am I?’_

I hear a door open and the light click clack of footsteps head towards me. I stop struggling to calm myself. I try to open my eyes again with minimal success. I have a giant spot in my field of vision.

“Commander are you sure you don’t want assistance?” says a voice from the direction of the open door.

“Yes I will be fine.”

So much authority came from the voice that I knew this must be the Commander I had been speaking to over the communicator. Still bleary eyed I try to face the Commander but can only see the smallest amount of light around the edges of my vision so I close them again.

“Are you in pain? I can have my medic take a look if you’d like.”

In the pause that came I heard several more click clacking of shoes and the jingle of armor. Perhaps the smell of gun fire.

“Commander you shouldn’t be left alone with him. He is dang-”

“Thank you for your concern but I don’t think he’ll be moving much anytime soon. You may go.”

The sighs and footsteps sounded as though they were very reluctant to obey this order. After the majority of footsteps leave the room, one set takes a couple steps closer.

“With respect, Commander. I must decline to follow that order,” says the soldier. “I will not interfere however I must insist on staying with you.”

After a moment the Commander says, “Very well, if you insist, then you are welcome to stay.”

Feeling her eyes on me, I manage to croak out, “You truly are someone who does things differently aren’t you? You have also earned such respect from your men. I’m glad I was captured by you and not some other person. However that brings me to a question if I may ask?”

“By all means, please ask.”

“Why?”

“Why what? Please be more specific with your question.”

“Why am I alive? Why did you save me?” I tried to keep my voice level but I could feel tears starting to drip down the side of my face. “I was trying to kill you and everyone on the command deck so why?”

“Why? Why would I keep someone from dying? Someone who supposedly is a murdering bastard without a conscience?” I turn my head away at her words. Trying not to hear them. “Because I know you’re not.” I hear a grunt from the soldier and my eyes open in surprise as my head snaps back to her. I can’t see her very well still but I know the direction she is standing. The Commander continues without hesitation. “I know you are not what they say you are.”

“How can you know? I don’t get it, first you try to speak to someone who hasn’t spoken to anyone in I don’t even know how long. Then you save his life and believe me when I say I’m innocent?” By the end of my rant my voice raised and I felt sorry about it.

Her response came agonizingly slow, perhaps to give me a chance to recover my emotions. “Yes. I believe you when you say you’re innocent. However it doesn’t change the fact that you attacked the Collective.” Her voice lowered as she continued, “Jason’s younger brother,” I could feel her gesture to the soldier, “was among the first people to confront you in the city closest to your destroyed home. I hear that’s where you got your ship. It was his, and-“

“Malykai.”

“Don’t say his name you bastard! You don’t have the right!” the soldier yelled and took a couple steps toward me. The click of the safety being undone could be heard.

“Stand down, Jason.”

“No he’s right. I don’t have the right to say his name. The man who saved my life that day by giving me his ship,” I close my eyes as tears begin to stream down the sides of my face at the memory. “He was a true friend. He was the first to believe I didn’t do it. He had- I mean, has kids of his own. His daughter, Elizabeth was only 2 and he had a boy on the way. He said if I ever met his brother I should tell him the name he chose.”

“Shut up! What do you know? You probably tortured him for that information right before you stole his ship and destroyed the city!”

I could feel the tip of his gun pressed into my ribs now. With the pain in my ribs, the tears coming harder and faster now, I said, “He told me his first choice was a name he felt was owned by the strongest person he knows.” I open my eyes to look him in the eye, as my vision is finally clearing up, only to find his face red and wet with his own tears, “Jason. He wanted to name his son after his big brother but would leave the decision up to him. His next choice was his grandfather’s, Johnathon. He prefers that name over the other grandfather, Charles. He said the nickname for it sounds too much like the nickname for a type of wine. T-“

“Two buck Chuck,” sobbed the soldier. “It’s a terrible wine.”

“Hey it’s not that bad. That’s what I had when I last had dinner with my ki-” I stop and turn away, my heart breaking all over again. “Anyway that’s what I promised him. Take it or leave it. It’s up to you. The next time you see him tell him thanks for me ok? Tell him I survived as long as I could.” The sound of gasps drew my attention back to the soldier and Commander. “What did I say now?”

The soldier merely looked at the lady Commander who nodded and took a step closer to me. The soldier stood and walked to the door of the white room where he paused and looked back for a split second before continuing out the door.

“Rest now,” says the Commander as she presses a button on the wall near my bed. “Rest and we will talk again soon.”

“Wait what’s going on? Why did he leave like that? Why… Wha…” unable to keep my eyes open anymore or keep talking I fall into darkness.

***


	3. What the hell is going on?

***

I look up at the man walking toward me, his gun raised and aimed at me. He has a smirk on his face, “I finally caught you. Thought you could run from the Collective did you? Well no more running.”

“Why… Why are you hunting me? My family may have been killed and I’m the one you chase down?” my voice becomes shrill. “I need to know if my family survived! My kids and parents were home when I left so where are they? Tell me!”

The soldier looks at me curiously, “You really don’t kno-”

The sound of gunfire startles me from the memory. My eyes open with a start and I’m blinded again by the light in front of me. Had I been a religious man I may have thought something of it. I try to look around but still have the black spot in my vision. I close my eyes again and try to relax into the stiff bed when the door opens with the sound of click clacking feet.

I let out a sigh, “So I said something that no one was happy with and you drugged me. I’m guessing you can also kill me also right?”

“Did you blind yourself again?” comes the Commander’s voice with a touch of humor.

I sigh again, “What a way to answer the question. I suppose I’ll just assum-”

“Didn’t you already make that mistake once?” the Commander interjects. “Yes I pressed a button on the wall and if the button next to the anesthesia is pressed then a lethal dose will be released into your system. I would prefer not to use it so please behave.”

“Yes ma’am. So what do I owe the pleasure of this visit? What other soldier is waiting to give me piece of his mind?”

“No, I won’t be allowing anyone else to come into this room without my expressed permission.”

“And what of Jason?” _I can still feel his gun in my side_, I think to myself. “I don’t think he trusts me enough to leave you alone with me.”

A small laugh comes from the Commander, “That’s why I didn’t tell him I would be here to speak with you. He is a good man and a great soldier, but losing his brother hurt him dearly and it may take a long time for him to accept the truth.”

“The truth that I didn’t kill his little brother?” The Commander breaths in sharply. “I thought about it and I realize now, that I’ve known all along. That the man who saved my life, who gave up his ship so I could find who did this to me and my family also gave up his life. After our last conversation that is the only thing that makes sense. He told me he would get picked up by a transport. That he would explain how I overpowered him to get the controller to his ship and that he was powerless to stop me,” I take a deep breath, trying to keep my voice level. “I flew away only to turn back and watch the two ships in orbit fire on the city. I chose to believe the words of my friend, that he would be fine and escape but something inside me died and now I realize it wasn’t for the city or the citizens inside it. It was for him and what he gave up for me. For someone he doesn’t know. For someone-”

“For someone he believes in and trusts. I’m as shocked as you are. I met him and it took a long time before he would treat me with true respect. Not the fake kind my rank calls for but true and honest respect. He was never a trusting man so he must have seen something inside you that allowed his guard to come down. I’m happy all the more to meet you and be able to speak to you like this. I-”

The jingle of armor stops her. “Commander another cruiser has arrived in high orbit. They're hailing us.”

“Thank you, I’ll be right there,” I can feel the Commander’s eyes fall back on me. “We will continue this conversation again soon. I suppose I could move you to a cell instead of keeping you tied to the medical bed. Perhaps when I come back we’ll see about your new accommodations.”

As she walks out I only notice the one pair of steps. The soldier is still in the room with me and I can feel the sweat beading on my forehead. I open my eyes and look in the direction of the door to find Jason watching me with a look of uncertainty. I close my eyes, take a deep breath and prepare to speak but before I could open my mouth I hear him walk out of the room and the door slide shut behind him. I let out a sigh of relief. I really had no idea what I was about to say to 

True to her word, the Commander returned to the medical room shortly after leaving to speak with the other ship. As I look over to her I notice about six soldiers behind her and a woman wearing a white coat. She says to the Commander, “He is stable enough to be moved however I don’t recommend much stress.”

“Thank you, Doctor Qhullani. I do believe he is tougher than we think. Jason, please remove the restraints.”

The soldier from before walks to the side of my bed and releases the strap holding my left hand. As he walks around the foot of the bed to my right side, I resist the urge to move my arm, rub my face or squeeze my hand into a ball. After Jason releases my right hand he moves to my legs and takes off those straps. I look at the Commander, waiting to be told when I can move, I don’t want to give anyone reason to shoot me. She looks back with a hard stare and says, “Please stand up.”

_Is she afraid of me?_

The authority in her voice tells me she expects nothing but utter compliance. As I try to sit up the ribs on my left side feel as though someone just set them on fire. I grunt and squeeze my eyes shut. I notice a hand on my shoulder and upper back. Startled, I wince away from the hand on my shoulder and begin to fall back to the bed but the hands hold tight. The hand behind me pushes me the rest of the way into a sitting position. Through the pain in my ribs I open my left eye to see who is helping me. Jason is there watching my face. “Thank you.” Then I add, “I’m sorry.”

He makes a non-committal sound and begins to pull me toward the edge of the bed. As I slide my legs to the floor and land on them the pain in my ribs flare up and shoots down my leg. I refuse to look weak in front of these soldiers however the pain makes me lose my balance. As I begin to fall, Jason grips my arm tighter and manages to hold me up. As I get my legs underneath me again the pain in my ribs lessens to a dull roar.

“May I give him something for the pain, Commander?” comes the voice of the young woman.

The pain gets worse again but slowly opening my eyes I see the white coat walk up to me with something in her hand. The pain flares up again I can’t stand the pain anymore, I put my right hand to my hurt ribs. I know I startled the woman, Qhullani I think her name is, because I hear a sharp gasp and the click of safeties being undone.

Through gritted teeth, I breathe as deeply as I can and wait for the order to have me shot. “Shoot him he’s trying to hurt her!” Or “He’s trying to get away!” I mean really, where am I gonna go? Nothing happens except Jason lifts my left arm from my side and I feel a sharp poke. My ribs immediately begin to feel better. I manage to open my eyes look at the woman in the white coat, “Thank you. I’m sorry if I scared you, it wasn’t my intention.” Without waiting for a response, I look at the Commander and ask, “So where to now?”

She nods and lifts a hand toward the door. Jason leads me out into the hall and I notice there are more soldiers than just the six I saw in the room. It seems they really don’t trust me as there are a total of twelve armed men and women waiting for me. They all look at me expectantly but when I don’t do anything they turn and start walking. I do notice however the looks of disappointment on some of their faces as they turn away. I let out a light huffing laugh, the best I can manage through the pain at least, and say, “Not the criminal you thought I was huh? I suppose from all the stories about me you expected me to try and run.” As some glance back over their shoulders at me I add, “Well I’m sorry to disappoint you all. I’m just not feeling it today.”

As the pain in my ribs lessens with every step, I chance a glance at Jason’s face. He still has a hold of my arm and is more or less holding me in my upright position. “I think I can manage now, Thank you.” He looks at me and stops walking for a moment. As he lets go, my leg begins to throb with shooting pain again. I breathe in sharply through my nose and grit my teeth. As I take a step forward I feel my knee start to give so I slowly put pressure on it.

“The pain should lessen well enough soon,” I hear from my right side. Concentrating on my leg as hard as I was, I almost jumped out of my skin and gave a small yelp when the doctor speaks. She gives me a small smile as the soldiers turn and face their guns at me. “Sorry did I scare you? It _was_ my intention.”

“Low blow,” I said shaking my head. “They could’ve shot me.”

“I thought you were the infamous destroyer. The one who can get out of any situation? The one who sees everything and everyone’s next move? No? Not you? Oh well,” she shrugs and starts walking slowly.

“Those are new. I haven’t heard those ones before.”

“Just a few things I’ve heard about the man who has been running from the Collective for nigh on five years.”

“Five huh? Has it really been that long?” I mumble as I look down at the floor.

From behind me I hear, “Rycon please keep moving.”

Startled out of my thoughts, I hastily say, “Of course, sorry.”

As I take a step forward I notice Jason’s hand is back on my arm. I’m not complaining, I’m in so much pain I want to crumple into a ball. Just as Qhullani had said though, the pain seems to lessen with every step. Soon enough, my walking gives Jason enough reason to let go of my arm and just walk next to me.

I look over at the doctor, “Has it really been five years?” My question seems to startle her and she stares at me with a bewildered look. As she nods her head, I sigh, and ask, “What’s the date?”

Looking even more curiously at my question she turns to look behind us, perhaps at Commander Ellie. When she looks back to me she says, “Standard Zulu date is the nineteenth of August. Why?”

I stop walking and everyone looks at me. I turn to Jason, “If the due date was correct, your niece or nephew would be five years old today. I’m sorry it took so long to tell you what his wishes were. I’m truly sorry for everything.”

The shocked look on his face suggests that he can’t believe I remembered this information. “He really did help you didn’t he?”

I look back to the floor and start walking again. I’m walking alone until a few moments later when the doctor steps up next to me again. “How’re your ribs?”

I wiggle the fingers of my right hand which is still clutching my ribs only to find a dull pain now. “They’re feeling much better now thank you.”

About five minutes later the soldiers ahead of me stop and face me. I hear Commander Ellie’s voice now, “Let him inside please.”

As the door to my left slides open, I look into the room. It’s not a jail cell. I look back at the Commander, “Guest quarters? What is this?”

She motions for me to go inside. The only people to follow are Ellie, Jason and the doctor. “Aren’t you afraid I’ll try and escape? Apparently I can get out of any situation,” I say sarcastically as I look from Ellie to the doctor and back again.

“Which is why there will be guards posted outside the door at all times. I’m giving you a chance so don’t blow it,” says the Commander.

“You may want to lay down now,” Qhullani suggests. At my questioning look she adds, “Or at least sit down. The pain killers will be wearing off soon.”

I nod at that, “So just in case I tried to get away I wouldn’t be able to get far.” Still nodding I turn to the bed and step over to it.

“Before you get too comfortable I have questions for you.”

I stop and turn to look at Ellie. My head begins to swim, “Go ahead.”

“Why do you think I’ve put you in this room?”

I laugh a little but stop almost immediately as my ribs begin to throb. “I’m thinking because you do things differently.”

“You may want to sit down before you get too dizzy. The room should start spinning soon,” the doctor says quickly.

“Soon?” I ask with a little irritation. “How about already? Wow, what did you give me?” The smile on her face fades into shock as I feel myself falling backwards. “Holy shit. What the hell did you give me?”

“Just a little something for the pain and a slow acting sedative.” Her voice sounds so far away but I know she is right next to me.

“Slow… until… the effects start. Then… Shi… Dirty tri…”

***


	4. Injuries?  Explosion?  I'm Not A Monster!

***

I look up at the man walking toward me, his gun aimed at me. He has a smirk on his face, “I finally caught you. Thought you could run from the Collective did you? Well no more running.”

“Why… Why are you hunting me? My family might have been killed and I’m the one you chase down?” my voice becomes shrill. “I need to know if my family survived! My kids and parents were home when I left so where are they? Tell me!”

The soldier looks at me curiously, “You really don’t know do you?” the soldier asks, his gun pointed at me. “Your fam-” gun shots suddenly ring through the street. The soldier looks around quickly before focusing on me again. “Stand up,” he demands. At my hesitation he says more calmly, “Stand up… please. You need to come with me and we can discuss this in private.”

Shots sound closer than before and I flinch. As I stand up, another shot rings through the air and I see the man in front of me stumble forward holding his right shoulder. As I move forward to help him he turns halfway around and yells in the direction the shot came from, “Hey, you shot me asshole! What the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“Sorry Major! I thought you were him,” comes a voice from down the street.

“No numskull, go look in that direction!” he points off to the side.

“What about your shoulder? We need t-”

“I said look in that direction! That’s an order! I’ll be fine, you’re still a terrible shot.”

I notice the spot where the bullet hit the soldier, “You’re bleeding.”

As the soldier turns back to face me the look on his face shifts from annoyance to a mixture of pain and relief. “So you really aren’t the type of person they said you are. We need to go now.”

He takes a few steps towards me and trips on a rock. As I step forward to catch him I’m brought back to the room with calm lights and a dull pain in my ribs. Sitting up in the bed and staring forward, I’m trying to figure out why this memory keeps playing in my dreams.

“Oh you’re finally awake,” comes the light happy voice of Qhullani from the other side of the room. “Sleep ok?” she gets up from the table and walks over to me.

I sigh and put my head in my hands, “No. No I didn’t. I keep having the same dream over and over again.”

Tears begin to wet my face as Qhullani sits on the bed next to me. She places her hands on my shoulders and says, “Its ok, you’re safe here. You’re safe with us. Even the soldiers are starting to realize you’re not who they thought you were. The fact that you didn’t try to escape while there were no guards to stop you says a lot about the person you are.”

I look up into her eyes, “Thank you for being so kind.” Her smile suddenly gets bigger and I see a gleam in her eyes.

_Uh oh._

“So now that we’re friends, I want you to lay down.” As I give her a questioning look she laughs, “No, no it’s not like that, I need to check your ribs.” I groan the whole way back down on the bed. “Oh shush. You’re fine.”

As she lifts my shirt and starts poking and prodding the door opens and Ellie walks in with Jason trailing behind. “Please put a sign on the door if you’re planning on doing that, or better yet, lock the door so no one can walk in on you.”

Qhullani jumps off the bed and pushes on my ribs in the process. “Oh Commander, it’s not what it looks like, I was checking his ribs.”

“Oww! Why would you do that?”

“Oh I’m so sorry!” She puts her hand back on my ribs. “Well they’re healing nicely,” she says, and I can hear the smile she tries to give me.

Breathing deep and slow, I open my eyes to find her looking down at me with a weak smile and apology in her eyes. “It’s fine. I’m fine. The pain is almost gone, don’t worry about it,” I add when I see the look of disbelief on her face. I move to sit up, trying to look at the Commander through a haze of spots in my vision. “Wow I got up too fast. By the way, where is this water I’m supposed to be drinking?” Qhullani squeaks and Ellie gasps. Footsteps away from me and back again can be heard. “Ha-ha, you forgot to bring in water, huh, Qhullani?”

“I, uh,” she stammers.

“Here,” I hear Jason say. A hand grabs one of mine and a cup is put into it. “Are you alright?”

“Yes I’m fine, just have a few spots in my vision. Nothing a little water won’t cure. Thank you.” I take a few short sips before asking, “So what’s next on the agenda?”

Ellie laughs a little, “You don’t know how to take it easy do you?”

“No not really. These last couple of days, or at least I think it’s been days, I’ve relaxed more than the last few months. I’m getting restless and need to do something. How’s the saying go? ‘No rest for the wicked.’” The silence in the room is sudden and painful. “Oh come on! If I can’t joke about this, then what can I joke about?”

Jason clears his throat, which sounds an awful lot like a stifled laugh, “So what are we going to do now? He is essentially dead as far as the Collective are concerned. Commander Sabien was convinced of Rycon’s deat-”

“Commander Sabien only pretended to believe our lie. From here on we need to tread carefully, he will be watching for any sign of the truth, or what he thinks is the truth anyway. We may even be the next target on his list. I don’t trust him and he knows that.”

“That’s why he wanted to search the ship upon his arrival, he wanted to make sure we were telling the truth,” Jason says.

“Yes, because we didn’t have a body to prove he had died made it all the more likely we had lied,” Ellie adds.

“But what about the explosion and all of the injuries?” Qhullani jumps in.

At that I splutter and spit out the water I had been drinking in surprise, “W-what? Explosion? Injuries?” as my vision clears I look up at my three guests. “What do you mean explosion and injuries?”

Ellie shoots Qhullani an angry look, “When we got your ship in to the cargo bay and removed you from the cockpit, the engine core went critical and exploded before we could evacuate the area. A number of the soldiers there were blown back and injured. Although, you might say the explosion saved your life.”

At my questioning look Qhullani says, with too much excitement, “It’s like the ship knew you were going to die because when it exploded, your body received a shock big enough to restart your heart without completely destroying it.”

“Can I go see them?” The surprised gasps made me scowl and I stand up. “OK so let’s go then.”

“Why?”

“Why what? You’ll have to be more specific with your question,” I say only slightly mocking the question Ellie once asked me. Before she could say anything I continue, “Why would I want to go see the people that were injured and could have died by my ship? Oh I don’t know, maybe because I feel bad that they were hurt? Or maybe just the fact that I feel responsible and want to tell them how sorry I am. Would that be ok with you?”

Ellie looks at me expectantly. “You done? That’s fine if that’s what you intend to do however I don’t want you to have too much contact with any of them.”

“Fine, I’ll say ‘Hi everyone, I’m sorry my ship blew you up. Thanks for getting me out of it before that happened though.’”

“Hopefully something more sincere than that but yes, something like that will do. Jason, will you please escort him to the Med. Bay? I want to have a word with Qhullani so we’ll catch up,” Ellie says with an unhappy look.

“Of course.” He leads the way out the door and I follow a few paces behind. The two guards outside the door follow behind me.

Glancing back at the door I ask Jason, “Is Qhullani going to get in trouble for something?”

He laughs, “She’s always getting into trouble for something. I heard she left personnel files in your room while Commander Sabien was aboard the ship.” At my confirmation he continues, “That’s a very bad thing to do. She could be court-martialed for something like that.”

“Just for leaving the files in an empty room while no one else is even able to ‘accidentally’ walk in and find them there?” Jason gives me a curious look. “Everyone was called away right? For an inspection of some kind?”

He stops walking and glares at me, “How did you know about that? You weren’t supposed to kno-”

“So much for trusting me huh?” I glare back at him, “It doesn’t matter how I found out just that I didn’t try to run away right? Besides, I said I wouldn’t go anywhere so I kept my word. I’m nothing if not honest. You can glare at me all you want but it’s not going to change my mind. Can we continue please?”

“Fine, if you say so.” The rest of the 5 minute walk and elevator ride we spent in silence. Jason suddenly steps in front of me, stops and turns quickly to face me. “These people still haven’t decided to trust or believe your story so be prepared for a lot of anger.”

Mentally preparing myself I nod my head and follow Jason through the door. Immediately the soldiers start cat calls and jeering at Jason. When they see me the happy mood ceases and when I look around the room, my gaze is met by glares. Some of the soldiers have bandages on their heads while others on various limbs.

“What the hell is he doing here?” One of the soldiers says in a loud voice. Others grunt their approval of the question.

“He should be in a cell.”

“Or dead!”

Jason looks back at me before facing the soldiers, “He wanted to speak to you. So I’m allowing him a moment of freedom.”

“I don’t care what he has to say to us! He doesn’t deserve to be out of his cell. What could he say to us that will change what he’s done or how we feel about him anyway, huh?” The first soldier queries.

The room falls silent and everyone looks expectantly at me. As I open my mouth to speak, a soldier walks through the doorway we entered from, “Major, I need to speak with you.”

“Very well,” then he puts a hand on my shoulder and says, “I’ll be right outside. Holler if you need me.”

I nod and he walks past. I know how this scene goes, it happens all the time in the old movies. The guards leave and the guy gets beat up. Even knowing how this will go, I step forward to face everyone, “I’m sorr-”

“Huh? What was that? We can’t hear you.”

“I said, ‘I’m sorry.’ None of this would have happened if it weren’t for me. I tru-”

“Look at that guys! He’s sorry. He’s sorry and says it’s all his fault. Can you believe that? After he finally gets caught. After he dies and is brought back to life. All he has to say is ‘He’s sorry.’” Everyone starts laughing a harsh mocking laugh. I look back to see if they triggered Jason’s ears. “Awe looking for your knight in shining armor? You think he wants to help you?”

“No. He’s the last person I expect to come to my rescue. After all, I’m the last person to see his brother alive.”

At that the soldiers that could stand get up and surround me. The first soldier walks directly into my face, “Yeah we know. Must’ve been hard to torture Malykai to giving up his flight codes huh? You steal his ship and wreak havoc on every civilization you come across.” During the soldiers jeering and taunts I’d been trying to keep my face still however it must have betrayed something here for his face turns even redder than it was. “Oh don’t tell me, you didn’t know. All of those places did it to themselves, right? Oh wait I remember, ‘I didn’t do it! I’m innocent!’ What a load of bullshit. You knew exactly what you were doing when you destroyed the cities on your own planet. What happened huh? Something snap inside you and just decide to kill everyone?”

I’m having a hard time keeping my mouth shut by this point. I’ve heard all of this before but I realize now how tired of hearing it I am. Before I can open my mouth to speak, to tell him how wrong those stories are, another soldier chimes in, “Some of us had homes on the planets where you attacked and killed so many people.”

Still staring into the first soldier’s eyes I open my mouth to say something but he cuts me off, “That look says you’re tired of this, does that mean you’re tired of destroying or hearing about your destruction?”

“I’m tired of hearing about how I’m a monster, yes. I’m-”

“Ho did you hear that boys?”

“-tired of being the bad guy, yes. But above all, I’m tired of the lies. I did not-” I’m cut off by a fist to my left cheek.

_Oww that hurt._

I take a moment to look at the soldier in the eyes again and continue, “I did not do those things.” Another fist to the face has me spun around for a moment facing the way I came into the room. For a moment I think I see Ellie and Qhullani but immediately look back at the soldier. “No matter how many times you hit me, the fact remains; I did not destroy anything. The Collective did all of the destroying. I killed when I had no choice, but ran anytime I could. I hate fighting and killing. I would rather die myself than take another life, however I have something I need to do before I die.”

“Oh really,” says the soldier. “And what might that be?”

“I need to find out what happened to my family and bring justice to the person who hurt them. I need to kill only one more time and then I can rest and all the people caught in the crossfire can rest easy.”

“You’re so pathetic. You really think someone will believe that shit? The major’s brother died in your attack on that first city and I don’t see him here to protect you. He’s not gonna stop me from killing you.”

“I don’t blame him,” gasps from the rest of the soldiers make me smile a bit. “No I don’t blame him if he lets me die by your hands, although I’d prefer it if he killed me. Hell, with the bullshit I’ve been through I’d welcome it, after my promise is fulfilled. As I said before I’m the last person to see his brother alive, and I have nightmares about it more times than I can count. But not for the same reasons you think. He was kind to me and he deserved better than what he got. I have to live with that memory every day and I live without my children every day as well. So if you want to kill me here than stop threatening me and do it. I’m sorry all of you were injured when my ship blew up so take out your anger.” Waiting for the end to come I look side to side. “No one? Really? But I’m the monster everyone has been trying to catch for… Shit how long did Qhullani say... Oh yeah five years. Five years I’ve been living without my children and five years ago I was given a ship to try and survive. Malykai gave me his ship, I didn’t steal it or torture him. He gave it to me. But you’re right, the majority must be right, I must be a monster. That’s what ‘everyone’ says right? So it must be true. So? I’m right here, do something about it.”

The first soldier hit me again and this time I fall to the floor and the air gets knocked out of my lungs. I stand up as quickly as my lungs will allow and get knocked down again. Over and over I fall to the ground and every time I get up. Before I knew it I was being kicked from all sides, my left ribs got kicked a few times and I did my best to not yell out in pain. I wouldn’t give them the satisfaction of knowing how bad it hurts.

Through my wheezing and the grunts and yells of the soldiers, I hear, “Enough! Get back in bed!” As the kicking stops I start to stand up and face whoever came into the room. When I get to my feet and hold my head up high to show how unaffected I am, I turn to face the first soldier. As his face comes into focus, I say once more, “I didn’t do it.”

Suddenly the room begins to spin. As I’m falling, I hear, “Rycon!”

***


	5. The Meeting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rycon is forced to endure the ultimate torture... Waiting. Waiting is so annoying, isn't it? Patience has never truly been one of my virtues.

***

“You really don’t know do you?” the soldier asks, his gun pointed at me. “Your fam-” gun shots suddenly ring through the street. The soldier looks around quickly before focusing on me again. “Stand up,” he demands. At my hesitation he says more calmly, “Stand up… please.”

His voice is much kinder than I would have thought possible from a soldier that was hunting me only moments ago. I slowly stand up as a pounding vibrates through my chest and stomach. I close my eyes and put my hand to my solar plexus and scream in pain.

My eyes open to find calm lights above me and my hand on my ribs. In response to the pain I squeezed my hand before realizing what I was doing. A soft voice says, “You’re ok. You’re safe.” With the voice a hand rests reassuringly on mine. I look down at the hand to find the doctor looking at me with concern. “I’m trying to check your ribs so please move your hand.”

I slowly move my hand to my side and stare up at the ceiling. “Sorry for that,” I say through a clenched jaw.

“I’ll give you something for the pain when I’m done.”

As she pokes and prods my ribs I try to ask, “Why are you being so nice?” but all that comes out is a grunted, “Why…”

She just laughs and says, “Because you have three broken ribs and I’m trying to make sure they haven’t puncture your lung. It would be a shame for you to die now of all times. They feel intact so I think you should be fine.”

I try to laugh but can only manage a weak huff. “Three huh? So no flying for what? A month?”

In response to my sarcastic question she pokes the middle broken rib harder, causing me to yell out in pain, and says, “Really? A month? Is that what you think?”

I close my eyes, shake my head as quickly as possible and say, “No. No. Just hoping. Oh fuck please stop it hurts so much.”

She pulls her finger away from my ribs and the pain dies down leaving a dull throb. “Huh. You might be in worse shape than I thought. I’ll have some food sent in for you. I see you haven’t had any water to drink. I’ll need you to drink it when it arrives and then eat what you get. Even if you don’t like it or it takes you all day to eat it you need to finish what you get.”

“Yes ma’am. Whatever you say, just please don’t do that again.”

I hear a small laugh as the bed shifts slightly. The door slides open and I hear her leave. After taking a few deep breaths I roll over to my right side and try to put my feet down on the floor. The pain is so great I almost slap my hand back to my ribs but, miraculously, I don’t. As my feet hit the floor I open my eyes and begin to stand. The room is quite large, big enough to put another bed and still have room for both people to have their own space. The walls are plain white and have no decorations of any kind.

_Very bland in here. Could use some color._

I spot a door on the other side of the room. It happens to be the bathroom and I manage to stagger into it. I lift my shirt in the mirror to take a look at my ribs. The bruise I see is massive and I understand now what the doctor, Qhullani, meant when she said she was checking to make sure I didn’t have a punctured lung. The bruise is on my upper ribs with a dark purple spot in the center of the area.

_I wonder what I hit to get that. Or who hit me. Probably Jason._

I let out a sigh and let my shirt fall back down when I realize I’m only wearing a flimsy hospital gown. The back of my neck feels hot and my cheeks turn red. Looking around the bathroom I notice a towel next to a shower.

“I could use one of those,” I say aloud to myself. I slide the gown off, step into the shower and turn the water on to warm. As the steam fills the room I stand with my back to the shower head while it spills on my head. The only thing that matters now is the steam and water running over my body. It feels like everything is melting away. The water feels so nice I could stay here for another five years.

I’m jolted back to myself with a loud bang and pounding at the door to the bathroom. “Yes, yes. I’ll be right out.” Turning I shut off the water and slowly step out of the enclosure. Unsure if I should be wearing the hospital gown again or not, I choose to just wear the towel. Drying off my hair slightly I pat down the rest of my body and wrap the towel around my waist. When it feels secure I open the door, step out into the main room of quarters to find the Commander, with her longish blonde hair and milky white skin, Qhullani, her dark hair is almost red and very curly and her skin darker still, and Jason, with short blonde hair, bulky shoulders and armor jingling slightly as he turns in my direction, standing in the middle of the room. There’s a table and a few chairs in front of the bathroom door.

I can see the two women stiffen slightly as I step out with just the towel around my waist and Jason steps toward the door of the quarters. Walking back to stand in front of me he sets his gun down on the table and unzips his jacket. Putting the jacket over my shoulders he picks up his gun again and steps back. Surprise must have been plain on my face for the next thing I hear is, “See what I mean?”

I glance at the women’s smiles as they walk toward the table. “Uh, would you like to sit down?” I stammer waving at the table. I step back, giving the women the chance to pick their seats. Jason, already standing next to a chair puts a hand on the chair just to my right and watches the two ladies pick theirs. Qhullani chooses the chair directly to my left and Commander Ellie, the chair across from me. As there are only four seats I side step behind the last one. Everyone’s eyes fall on me for a moment before I realize why they are waiting. “Please, after you.”

_It’s been so long since I entertained guests._

“Thank you,” says Ellie as she pulls back her seat and slides gracefully into the chair.

Qhullani, much more quietly, says, “Thanks very much,” and sits down.

As I look at Jason, he looks back and says, “Thank you for your hospitality.” As he finishes speaking a knock comes from the doorway and he walks towards it; only to return a moment later with a bundle of clothes in his hands. Handing me the bundle, he smiles and says, “Please put these on.”

I stare at him for a moment before looking at the Commander who nods at me with a small smile. Looking back at Jason, I step into the bathroom. After hanging the jacket on the back of the door I put on the socks, dark pants and black shirt I received. The shirt has the logo of the Collective on the left side of the chest. For a moment, I see myself in the mirror as a soldier before plucking the logo off my chest and dropping it on the counter. I laugh to myself, _Its Velcro._ I spend another few seconds trying to comb back my almost shoulder length hair. _I forgot to get it cut on that planet. Oh well._

Stepping out of the bathroom, I find everyone in the same positions as I left them. I smile at them and, with as much humor as my ribs would allow, say, “Don’t mind me. Keep talking amongst yourselves. I’d hate to break this terrible silence with my presence.”

Qhullani laughs and about five seconds later she covers her mouth and coughs. Ellie glances over at her quickly and turns back to me, “Since our last meeting was cut short, I felt it necessary to speak to you the moment you were awake again. The reason I had you moved to this room isn’t just because I do things differently than most of the other Commanders in the Collective’s fleet. It’s because the cruiser that showed up demanded to search my ship for you and the brig would be one of the first places they would look for you.”

At this, my jaw drops open and I miss the seat of my chair. Jason, who has been watching me, manages to catch my arm before I hit the floor. Qhullani stands very quickly with a look of concern as I grab my ribs. I make it into my seat with Jason’s help. After giving him my thanks, I look at the Commander and ask, in a voice more shrill than I meant, “What? They want to search your ship for me and you decide to move me in here instead of giving me to them? For what reason would you have to, I don’t know, hide me from your own people?”

“They are not my people,” her voice has a dangerous feel to it. “They are government employees who only care about themselves. I told them your ship had been destroyed on your approach, which indeed it is no longer usable, and that you had perished before recovering your body from the ship.”

“Which by the way is technically true. You were dead for almost three minutes after your ship had been recovered,” Qhullani adds with a too cheerful sounding voice.

As I look down at my hands, Commander Ellie says, “Anyway. I want you to be comfortable while we talk about what happened to you.”

“What happened to me? You mean the fact that my home and family are gone, that I got blamed for the destruction of the civilization on my planet and everyone in the known universe hates me?” I look up into the Commander’s stern face. Her eyes show a little bit of pity, but I don’t want pity. I want those responsible to burn where they sit, to feel my anger and fear me. I want revenge.

“I understand how you feel right now however if we are going to find out who is responsible we need them to let their guard down,” Ellie gives me a slight smile at the dumbstruck look on my face before continuing. “Yes I just said ‘we need’ as I intend to help you in this venture.”

Everything seems to spin around me and I can feel myself start to sway in my seat. As I grip the table to keep myself from falling out of my chair, a strong hand grips my shoulder. I look up into the eyes of Jason who, for the first time since we met, gives me the warmest smile I’ve seen in a very long time. Still looking into Jason’s smiling face I ask, “You really trust me enough to go to war with me?”

Jason’s smile falters slightly as he sits down. His eyes don’t leave mine while he says, “You brought me the last words of my younger brother. Words I would never have heard if not for you.” A single tear begins to slide down his cheek. “Of course I will stand by you, as my brother had, in order to right this wrong. Ever since we were little I knew who I could trust because of him. He is the reason I serve under Commander Eliralazaraz.” He relaxes his grip on my shoulder and turns back to the women sitting at the table with us.

After a few seconds I turn to find Ellie watching me with her analyzing eyes and Qhullani sitting up with a proud smile. I open my mouth to speak but nothing comes out. Ellie puts her elbows on the table and leans forward, “You don’t have to be a part of this if you don’t want to be. We will be going through with this no matter your choice.

_What? She’s giving me a choice? Does that mean she’s willing to let me go? _My ribs throb as the thought passes through my mind.

My pain must have shown on my face for at that moment Qhullani stands up and steps to my side pulling a syringe out of her pocket. After sticking my arm she lifts my shirt to examine my bruised ribs before sitting back down. “You’re healing nicely. The bruising should go down in a few days as long as you don’t do too much to aggravate it.”

Rubbing the spot on my arm I look at her and say, “Thank you very much. So essentially you want to betray the government?” I face my question at Ellie.

“It’s not a betrayal on my part. I have the law on my side and will protect all who abide by it. Those people, no, those monsters who gave the order to destroy your home and kill everyone on your planet betrayed the people and the law. I once believed in them however hearing everything you’ve said made me realize my faith was misplaced. I will find out who is behind the needless deaths of hundreds, perhaps even thousands, of people. I swear this to you, Rycon, however I will not bring you along if you don’t feel up to it. This is your chance to make a new life for yourself, to move on, since they think you’re dead. No one wi-”

“No. I can’t live a meaningful life until I drive these monsters straight to hell. They think I’m dead you say? Then they won’t see me coming.” I give Ellie an evil smile.

A sigh comes from Qhullani, “Well at least wait until your ribs are more healed before you lead them to hell, ok?”

I look at her with a kinder smile and say, “Well I wouldn’t be able to at all if it wasn’t for you, so, doctor’s orders. I’ll need you to tell me what I can do and when.”

A knock at the door makes Jason stand quickly. “Please excuse me,” he walks to the door. “Commander,” he calls.

“Yes.”

“They’re on their way,” he says from the doorway.

Ellie rises with a heavy sigh, “Qhullani, I will need you to give your report in your office.”

_So she is going to help me get revenge?_

“Rycon.”

_Why is she helping me? How can she trust me so easily?_

“Rycon.” A hand on my shoulder shakes me out of my thoughts. I look up into the Commander’s face which wore a slight frown of worry. As I look at her, it changes to a smile, “Please stay here and out of sight until I come to get you.” She looks at the logo-less shirt. “Don’t let anyone from the other ship see you wearing that. It won’t go over well, even if they don’t recognize you.”

Nodding I shakily get to my feet. “Thank you Commander, for everything,” I stretch out my hand unsure of what else to say.

She smiles wider as she accepts my hand, “It may take time but we will find who is responsible.” She turns and walks out of the room with Jason following close by.

With a start I realize Qhullani is standing next to me. “Thank you so much for your help. I don’t think I could handle the pain in my ribs if it wasn’t for you.”

She smiles, “I know, but thank you all the same for the admission. Please let me know if your ribs become too unbearable. Some pain is good but if you can’t breathe that’s an issue. I’ll take my leave now, I need to be ready for our guests.” With that she turns on her heal and strides out of the room.

I call out to her, hoping she hasn’t gone too far. She steps back inside the room with a look of surprise. “Can you give Jason back his jacket for me please? Commander Ellie told me to stay here and I don’t know my way around anyway.”

She hesitates for a moment, “Sure, I can do that.”

I step into the bathroom and pull down the jacket. As I turn to step out, my eye is drawn to the patch I removed from the shirt. I pick it up and after giving Qhullani the jacket I put it into a pocket of my pants. “By the way, any chance you know where I can get a haircut?”

Smiling she says, “Yes as a matter of fact, I do.” Turning she strides out and disappears from sight.

“Oh my galaxies, there is nothing to do in this room! It feels like I’ve been in here for hours, how long do I have to wait?” I say to my empty room. Sitting down at the table I let out a sigh and just as my stomach growls I hear a knock at the door, “Uh, come in?”

The door slides open to reveal a soldier in light armor carrying a box like object. “Thank you,” a light and feminine voice says. The soldier walks into my room and places it on the table in front of me. At my questioning look the soldier sighs and grabs the little handle on the top of the box and pulls.

The smell that comes from it is so amazing my stomach growls even more and my mouth waters. On the table lay a tray of food consisting of a small pile of corn, mashed potatoes and a veggie mix. I’m about to dig in, literally, when the soldier holds utensils before me. I look up into the light green eyes of the smiling soldier, “Thank you.” I take the utensils as nicely as I can and begin eating.

I don’t even remember the last time I had a proper meal. A really good proper meal at least.

_These potatoes are delicious! The garlic and pepper mixed with this buttery flavor is so good. There’s something else in the mix too. I can’t quite pin down the flavor._

My face must have betrayed some of my thoughts for the soldier says in that light voice, “There good right? The chef won’t tell anyone what the secret ingredient is. He says it’s so we have to keep him on as our chef. The only reason he’ll tell anyone is if he decides to leave and even then I don’t think he will. Not that I’m complaining, I hope he never leaves.”

The corn and veggies have the same exquisite flavoring. “I don’t know how he made it work with all three of these foods but I’m in heaven right now.” Laughter makes me stop and look up at the soldier. The laughter of a young woman that feels very comfortable is a wonderful sound and for the first time in a very long time I smile at my fortune. “You have a nice laugh. I haven’t heard a real laugh like that in a long time.”

The soldier stops laughing as I look down at the food. “Thank you,” she says quietly.

As I finish the food on the tray I grab the lid from the table and place it on top. “Oh my goodness that was delicious. Why did the doctor say that I had to eat the food even if I don’t like it when it’s this good?”

“Doctor Qhullani doesn’t like garlic. The chef, Danyll, makes her a special version without it. I suppose it’s better for everyone but I feel bad for Danyll having to make two different batches. I hear he secretly puts small amounts of garlic in her food to try and get her used to it though,” she says the last part in a whisper.

“And she hasn’t noticed yet?” As the soldier shakes her head I give a little laugh, “That’s funny. By the way my name is Rycon.” I extend my hand towards her.

She hesitates before taking my hand, “Kaylin. You’re just as the Commander said you were, different.” I must have stiffened or reacted in a way she wasn’t expecting as she quickly adds, “In a good way, really. She said I can trust you and not to worry so much about protocol.”

“Oh ok. Do you always follow protocol then?”

“Well I try to because I’m a new recruit so I get into more trouble than anyone else if I break protocol. Since I’m fresh out of the academy, they expect me to follow it to the letter,” her expression falls and she looks down at the table.

“Well that sucks.” Her eyes jump up to mine in shock. “I mean isn’t everyone supposed to be treated equally? Why would a new recruit who is ‘New’ be penalized more harshly than someone who should know better in their many years of experience? That makes no sense to me.” My opinion, which she totally did not ask for, just fell out of my mouth before I could stop it. However the smile she gave me after I said what was on my mind told me she was ecstatic to hear she’s not the only one to feel that way.

“Thank you. I, um… I’m going to bring this back to the kitchen. I’m glad to have gotten the chance to meet you.”

As she walks out of the room I ask her, “Any chance I can get some playing cards or something?” The only response I receive is laughter. “So is that a no?” I call out. This time nothing. _She’s already gone I guess._

I decide to explore the room and find nothing of interest. _There’s not even a book in the nightstand._ Without a clock I find it hard to gauge the time so instead of waiting for it to pass by I lay on the bed and close my eyes. Suddenly I hear a loud crash that has me sitting up on the bed so fast the pain in my ribs doesn’t even register in my mind right away. As I move to get off the bed the door opens and Qhullani walks in holding a mess of paperwork and cup of some steaming liquid. Behind her a couple of soldiers walk in holding some more paperwork and give me a glare to tell me, “Don’t try anything just because our hands are full.”

Instead of glaring back at the soldiers, I turn to Qhullani, “Everything ok?”

“Hmm, oh yes I’m fine I’m just a bit a klutz. Thank you gentlemen just on the table is fine. I’ll sort everything myself. Thanks again.” When I look over at the soldiers they seem unsure of what to do. They look at each other before considering me again, hitting me with another glare.

I lay back on the bed again and close my eyes. _Maybe if I pretend to not notice they’re looking at me they’ll just go away._

“You’re dismissed,” Qhullani commands with such authority I even got nervous.

“You shouldn’t talk to them like that, they might not help you next time,” I say without opening my eyes.

The door slides shut. Sighing, she says, “I know but I just can’t stand it when people treat others like that. I wanted to make a point.”

“A point that you trust me more than them?” I laugh a little.

“What! No I trust them with my life!”

I turn to face her, “I’m pretty sure that’s how they took that.”

The look of irritation on her face grows before she sighs again. “You might be right.” Getting up from her seat at the table, she walks over to the door and knocks. I close my eyes again as the door opens and she steps outside. A moment later she returns with one of the guards. “This is Henry, he will be keeping watch while I’m here, ok?”

I open my eyes, sit up and kick my feet off the bed, turning to face the soldier. I notice a slight twitch in the man’s hands and I smile, “It’s nice to meet you Henry, I’m Rycon. Make yourself at home, the good doctor already has.”

“Oh ha-ha,” Qhullani says as she walks over to the table again.

“So to what do I owe the pleasure of this visit? Knock too many things over in your office so you decided to come here and drop stuff?” I ask with a wide smile to which I receive a glare.

“No,” she retorts with a little shake of her head. “My office just happens to be the first place on the ‘tour’ and I don’t want to be there.”

“I thought you had to be there to give your report? Isn’t that what the Commander said?”

“Ugh, I was hoping no one would remember that order. I suppose since you reminded me,” she glares at me, “I’ll have to go won’t I?” Standing up she walks towards the door.

“What about your paperwork? Don’t you need that for your report?”

She looks at me then the paperwork, “No, I’ll be fine without it. Those are personnel charts of soldiers who have been injured on the job. The higher ups like to take away those people and replace them with their own spies. I do my best to make sure the ones who want to stay can and those that are ready to leave, do. Most of the time they don’t want to leave but there are a few who have seen enough to make the decision much easier.” Her eyes glaze over for a few seconds before breathing in sharply and saying, “Don’t touch them.” With that she turns and strides out of the room.

I take a few moments to sort that through my head. _How do they know that’s what’s going on?_

A voice in the doorway says, “I was one of those spies she talked about.” The soldier that accompanied Qhullani inside, Henry, is still standing in the doorway. “I changed sides after seeing for myself the type of person Commander Eliralazaraz is and what she is to these people. About four years ago she caught me trying to damage the ship on the government’s orders. They wanted to purge everyone who had any connections to your incident. Many of the crew worked for the Collective at that time and I was assigned to her crew with one order; to destroy the ship. When she found me trying to sabotage the ship she gave me a choice; help her weed out the people responsible or die with everyone and her ship. I decided to join her finding out later the true traitors are the government officials. I’m glad I decided to trust her. The Commander has been honest, open and caring so if you do anything to hurt her or her reputation, I’ll kill you myself.”

Turning he steps out the door. Before the door closes I call out, “I think Jason has first dibs on my life.” The door shuts and I’m alone again. A few minutes later I hear a knock from the door. “Come in,” I call out and to my surprise, Kaylin walks inside with something in her hands.

She stops in the middle of the room as the door closes and smiles, “I brought some cards per your request and with the Commander’s approval.”

“Wait you bothered her in the middle of her tour?”

“Pish, no, why in the universe would I do that? No, no she somehow knew you would want something to do and Jason gave them to me and said to be swift and not to lollygag. So here I am with them and now I need to go. They’re calling for all the soldiers on the command deck for uniform inspection.”

“All of them? Should you really be telling me that?”

Her expression suggests she hadn’t thought about that, “Oh, right, because you’re a prisoner. Shit, me and my big mouth. Please just forget I said that. I really like my job-”

“Calm down, its fine. I was just messing with you. You should hurry and get to the inspection though right?”

With a nervous nod she says, “Right,” and turns to walk out the door.

“Wait the cards.”

She stops and looks at the cards in her hands turns and tosses them to me. Almost running out the door she’s gone a second later. As I go to pull the cards out of their box a thought crosses my mind; why is everyone going to be on the command deck? Could it be that this person wants to search the ship without raising suspicion? _I’m going to have to be careful._ I walk around the room and tried to find a place to hide. After looking in the bathroom, finding no place to hide, I walk back into the main room and see something at the bed. I walk over and kneel down beside it looking at the panels of the base. One of the panels came off easily enough and I see a space under the bed large enough for me to hide. The panel seems easy enough to close again from the inside.

Replacing the panel I get up and walk to the door. Placing my head near the door to listen for anyone I wait for sound of footsteps or movement. I can’t hear anything so I knock on the door but no response comes.

Closing my eyes I concentrate on listening for any sounds. _Nothing. Wait, is that thudding?_ I decide to hide under the bed just in case they are searching for me. Running back to the bed I remove the panel and slide inside.

As I pull the panel shut I hear the door slide open, “As I said there is no way he could have survived the destruction of his ship, let alone hide somewhere on the ship. He died before we retrieved his ship. We’ve began to use the usable parts for repairs.”

_Ellie is a smooth talker, I may have to watch that._

“If he didn’t make it then why is this bed unmade?” a voice says angrily.

“Well it seems that my head doctor is using this room at the moment. The table has some personnel files from the medical center. Perhaps she is using this room to get some rest while doing work.”

“It’s quite messy in here isn’t it? She’s always been messy.”

“Sir?”

“Cegh,” scaufs the person with the Commander. “She never was very tidy.”

“I’m not sure I follow, Sir.”

“It’s nothing, just old memories of the past. Well let’s go,” he says gruffly.

“After you, please. Perhaps you’d like to see the mess hall or the room Doctor Qhullani is supposed to be staying in?” After a set of footsteps walk out of the room, Ellie says quietly, “Hopefully you’re still in the room somewhere. Give me about an hour then it should be safe for you.” I hear her footsteps walk out of the room.

***


	6. Do they really trust me or is it an act?

***

_I’m still waiting under the bed! Did she really forget about me? I mean really, I’m supposed to be her prisoner, how could she forget about me?_

No watch meant no way of telling time so for all I knew it had been a whole day. My stomach is growling pretty loudly by now and I’m considering getting out from under the bed to try and find food. _If someone sees me then I’ll deal with the consequences._

Reaching out to push the panel out I stop as the door opens and I hear two sets of footfalls enter the room. My hand stretched out to the panel and I wait to figure out what’s going on.

“Doctor Qhullani I can’t believe you left personnel files with him! And now he’s nowhere to be found. What am I going to do in this situation? What _should_ I do in this situation?” the Commander’s voice is harsh and very upset. “And what is with the tray of food? Do you think he’ll come back like a starving puppy to eat when he gets hungry?”

“Well I was thinking if he’s still around he will be hungry so, I suppose, yes. I’m sorry but I’m hoping he’s every bit the man he seems to be, honest, true and loyal. Or at least given everything that has happened to him I can only hope he won’t just decide to disappear. Perhaps he’s what we need to stop the collective, and what is necessary to start this war a new,” Qhullani’s voice quavers slightly as though trying to sound more sure than she feels.

“Perhaps you’re right but that’s still no reason to leave personnel files with him.”

“I told him not to look at them, I can only hope he is a man of his word when he says he won’t. I’m going to put the food here on the table while we search for him. Now that the _inspector_ is gone we should have no trouble searching the ship right?” I hear a rattle of metal hit the table.

_Is Qhullani nervous?_

A sigh, “Ugh, fine. Let’s find him and figure out our next move.”

I hear the ladies walk out of the room and the door close behind them. I push the panel out of my way and after crawling out from under the bed, replace it.

_If they don’t know that’s a viable hiding place then I’m not going to tell them._

I see the tray on the table, walk over and start eating. The same as before, corn, veggies and mashed potatoes. _This’ll do._

***

I’m halfway through the meal by the time the door opens again. “I’m telling you he has to be somewhere nearb-” Qhullani’s voice stops short as she walks into the room to see me looking in her direction with a spoonful of mashed potatoes hanging just before my open mouth.

“What’s wrong?” Ellie runs into the room with two guards behind her.

I turn toward them in my chair and put my hands up as the guards raise their weapons at me, “Sorry, I thought this was for me.” I lower the spoon into my mouth before raising it again.

“Ugh, where the hell have you been?” Ellie asks waving off the guards.

“Around,” I say with a mouthful of potatoes. After swallowing, I stare at her with my hands still raised, “Can I finish eating?” I start lowering my spoon into the potatoes.

Ellie strides, almost running, up to me and removes the spoon from my hand. “No you may not until you tell me where you have been!” Her voice is angry but there’s a slight bit of surprise, and is that admiration in her voice?

“B-but I’m so hungry! This is only the second meal I’ve had since being on the ship. How long has it been since,” I nod to Qhullani, “I was brought back to life? Three days? Four?”

Ellie scaufs at my questions, “What’s it matter, you’re alive right?”

I give her a dirty look, “Of course it matters!” I decide to forgo the spoon and use my fingers. No one ever said I couldn’t eat with my hands. It’s a bit messier, however I’m hungry enough to not care. “So how did it go with your guest?” I ask through a mouthful of food.

Ellie glares at me and my fingers, “It went fine, thank you for asking. Ugh, do you really have to do that?”

I look up at her, then down to my hand and back to her. Putting my clean hand out I wait a moment for her to put the spoon in it. When she glares at me some more I shrug. “Yes, I’m very hungry,” and turn back to the food to make my point.

“Ugck, fine,” she puts the spoon down on the table next to the tray and says, “Doctor I believe you found him. Now you can deal with him.”

Picking up the spoon to continue eating I can hear footsteps leaving the room. Curious, I take a look over my shoulder to see Qhullani standing there staring at me with wide eyes. “Are you going to say anything?” I ask her.

As though snapping out of a trance, she shakes herself and says, “I just didn’t actually expect you to be here when we came back. I’m sorry to say I thought you would try to run away, get a new ship and fly out of here.”

I laugh a little, “Then, no matter what the truth happens to be, my word will mean nothing. And you both trusted me so I felt I had to do the same,” I glance at her over my shoulder for a second. “Isn’t that what we’re supposed to be doing right now? Trusting each other?”

Footsteps behind me make my hand stop with the spoon in the potatoes. “Yes it is,” her hands come down on my shoulders. I want to shake them off but stay still. She is a doctor after all. “Thank you for not running, nor looking through the files I left,” I feel a pressure on the back of my head and her breathing on the back of my neck. “I’m really happy to know I can trust you.”

“I’m glad you feel that way.”

My voice must have had some uncertainty in it as she pulls back quickly. “Yes, well I hope you enjoy your meal. They’re pretty strict about how often you get to eat but I’ll see what I can do about getting you more.” Her footsteps can now be heard walking toward the door. They pause for a moment and then continue while the door slides shut.

I finish eating a few bites later, walk over to the bed and lay down. This bed is much more comfortable than the hospital bed I had started out on when I first woke up on this ship. I try to sleep but my mind won’t rest, everything that happened today keeps replaying in my head.

_Obviously the Commander wants to trust me but has a hard time doing so. Jason seems to trust me now but I’m not sure. He’s a nice guy when it comes down to it. Qhullani says she can trust me but must have been betrayed by someone and doesn’t quite seem able to fully let herself trust me. The rest of the soldiers definitely don’t trust me say for, Kaylin I think her name was. She seems able to trust me but I only saw her twice and very briefly so I don’t know._

Instinctively I put my hand to the bruise on my ribs as they throb dully while I contemplate who I can trust and trusts me. I wonder what happens next. Oh well, I suppose I’ll find out soon. It’s been a long day. With a smile I close my eyes and fall asleep.

***


	7. A Party Would Be Great!

***

_It sounds so distant, that name being called out. What was it again? Ry… I don’t remember. Where am I? Am I being shaken? What’s going on? Why is it so dark? Wait, my eyes are closed that’s why it’s so dark._

Struggling to open my eyes, I get just enough light to see the person leaning over me. Is that… “Malykai? You’re alive? I’m so glad. I’m sorry it took so long to meet your brother. I did my best to survive.”

“Shut up you idiot! Stay with me” The voice says in the distance. “Don’t close your eyes again. Stay awake damn you!”

_Wait… What? What’s going on?_ I try to open my eyes more but they feel so heavy.

_I’ve got to see what’s happening._

Somehow I force my eyes to open more and look into the face of my friend, Malykai. “Hey buddy, how you doing? I need you to stay awake, ok? Stay awake and stay alive, just a little longer.”

“Yeah ok, Malykai. I’ll do my best to stay awake but I’m so tired.”

“I know my friend but I need to ask a favor of you. I need you to watch over my brother so he can return home. I need him to watch over my kids. For him to do that he needs to stay alive and I need _you_ to make sure he does. Can you do that for me?”

“Yeah I can do that, Malykai, but what about you? And why does my body hurt so much?”

“Oh come on, you’ve felt worse than this. This is nothing you can’t handle. Hey by the way, I have three kids now. My wife had twins. Isn’t that great? Well, goodbye my friend, I know you will keep your promise. Stay alive to help him.”

I blink to get the strength to open my eyes again. The room is kind of dark and I can hear light snoring nearby. As I sit up to take in my surroundings I realize I’m in the guest room again. I look toward the sound of snoring to see Qhullani sitting at the table with her head on her folded arms sound asleep. Standing up slowly I grab one of the blankets from the bed and lay it over her gently. Walking back to the bed I collapse to my knees and hang off the side of the bed and fall asleep again.

***

The hiss of the door wakes me from sleep. I lift my head, turn to look at the door and find Jason standing in the doorway staring at me. He looks over at Qhullani and smiles slightly with a shake of his head. “How are you feeling,” he asks me quietly as he walks over to me and sits down on the bed. I sit up on the edge of the bed next to him.

“I’m ok. My body feels heavy and tired but otherwise I suppose I’m fine. How are you doing? And why is Qhullani sleeping at the table?”

“I don’t think Qhullani has left your room at all.” At my surprised look he laughs, “Ha-ha yeah she is pretty die hard. She’s been watching over you for the better part of two days so I don’t blame her for sleeping there.

“Two days?” My voice rises in surprise. “I’ve been asleep for two days?”

With a nod and a finger on his lips, Jason says, “Yep and she’s been awake for most of it.” His smile turns to a frown, “You’re such an idiot you know that?”

“I’ve heard that all too much throughout my life. I’m sorry for that.”

“You knew what would happen so why did you do it?”

“I needed to prove that I’m not a monster. To show that I don’t just fight when things go wrong. I needed them to release some of their anger so they could…”

“I get it, but that was pretty stupid still. It almost seemed like you wanted to die there.”

“If it would have made a difference…”

Jason looks at me curiously and I look down at my feet. “I believe that. Most of those soldiers said you started the fight, you know?”

“In a way I did. I told them everything they’d heard about me was a lie. What else was I supposed to do?”

“You have them wondering about you now. One of them said he thinks you might be telling the truth. He said ‘no one would take a beating like that to try and convince someone of a lie.’ You didn’t even cry out when they started to pummel you. That earned a little of their respect.”

“Oh really? He thinks I’m telling the truth, huh? Maybe I should get beat up more often, ha-ha.” Stretching, I groan, “On second thought, that wouldn’t be the best idea.”

Jason laughs softly, “No I don’t think so. Perhaps when you’re better recovered you can take another trip to see them. That may help your case with them.”

“Maybe, but right now I think I need some food. I’m starving.”

Jason stands and looks down at me, “I think both of you need to eat. I’ll have some food brought in for both of you.”

He walks out of the room and as the door slides shut with its normal hiss, I notice Qhullani stir under the blanket. Walking over to her, I rub her back and whisper, “Hey, Qhullani.”

She moans groggily, slowly lifting her head and looks at me. “Hmm, Rycon?” as though a switch flipped in her head, her eyes widen, her head shoots up, and she screams, “Rycon! You’re awake! How are you? How’s your head? Why are you standing-?”

“Hey calm down, I’m fine. You took great care of me. Thank you.”

“You should be resting! Wha… How did this blanket get here?”

“I put it on you because you seemed cold. Jason said he’s going to have some food sent down for us. Don’t worry everything is fine. I’m fine, really,” I add, sitting next to her, as she gives me a quick look over. At that moment the door opens and the smell of mashed potatoes and veggies fills the room. “Oh perfect timing, I’m so hungry.” To my surprise, Kaylin is the one carrying the trays. “Hello again.”

“Hello again to you too. I hear you’re very hungry.” At that, my stomach growls ferociously. “Yes I believe that’s what I heard, ha-ha. Good evening Doctor Qhullani, I heard from a little birdy this one is for you. I’ll be outside so if you need me just come get me.”

She sets down the trays and walks back through the door. “Did I hear your stomach growl just now? You really must be hungry,” Qhullani says with a small laugh.

“Oh yes and I love this food. The potatoes are smooth with just a few lumps and the veggies are sweet without overpowering anything else. Just the right amount of pepper and garlic but I can’t figure out what the sweetness is. I would almost say its sugar but it’s too smoothly wrapped into the other flavors.”

“Ha-ha well aren’t you into the food? If I didn’t know it I’d say you were a cook not a criminal.” Her hands shoot up to her mouth and she stares at me with disbelief in her eyes, “Rycon, I’m-”

“Oh if given the choice I’d much rather be a cook,” I look at her mischievously. Since she keeps looking at me with shock and sorrow in her eyes I decide to mess with her a bit more, “Oh being a wanted criminal is fun and all for the first, I don’t know, year or two, but after that it starts to go downhill fast. Cooking on the other hand always has something new to teach you.”

Her face slowly but surely changes from shock at what she said to sarcastic annoyance. She slaps my arm and laughs, “Shut up jerk. You didn’t even know how long you were running for until I said something. Oh shit, I’m sorry, I did it again.”

“You apologize a lot you know that? Hey you going to eat that?” I poke my fork at her veggies but she smacks my hand and slides her tray away before I could reach again.

“Hey! That’s mine. Eat your own,” she laughs again as she moves her tray back, keeping an eye on me.

“Ha-ha ok-ok. I get it, you’re not into sharing. Don’t worry I’ll remember that,” I poke my fork at her with a smile.

“You better. I don’t like garlic but I have to admit, it works with the other flavors and I do like the slight sweetness.”

“Hmm, so you’re a sweet girl, huh? I suppose that suits you.”

“You suppose? So you weren’t sure?”

“Oh of course I already knew that, I just meant that you like sweeter flavors. I knew you’re a sweet person. As she looks at me with those inquisitorial eyes, I can’t help but smile nervously. “I mean you’re such a nice person that the sweet flavors would… uh… I’m just gonna shut up now… before I dig myself deeper.”

Looking down at my food I can feel the back of my neck heat. _I hope I didn’t sound like I was insulting her. Should I try and fix this?_ Before I can open my mouth again I hear a light laugh and a hand on my shoulder. “You really are a nice and funny person. Thank you for being so kind.” Her hand slides from my shoulder across my back to my other shoulder. “Really, thank you,” she adds again as she leans her head on the shoulder closest to her.

My heart, already quickened by nervousness, speeds up even more with her half hug. As uncertainty runs through me, I try to figure out what she’s doing. “How’s your food? Other than the first meal Kaylin brought me this is the second home cooked meal I’ve eaten in a long time. Thank you for eating with me.”

Qhullani suddenly picks her head up and says, “Of course. It’s very good.” She hesitates, seeming to contemplate something. Finally she says, “Maybe at the next station you can join me in getting supplies. I don’t know if you’d want to or even if the Commander would allow it but I can ask if you want to help.”

When I turn to look at her I notice she’s looking away. _Perhaps she’s embarrassed by her question?_ “I’d like that,” I say with a smile. “Sounds like it could be fun. When do we get to the next station?”

She turns to look at me so fast, a thought crosses my mind. _Did she expect me to say no? Does she really want me there or is it just pity?_ Her bright and broad smile tells me the answer, “Great, I’ll ask her right away. I think we’ll reach the station in a few days.”

Pushing her chair back, she walks around the table and out the door. “Wait, aren’t you going to finish your food?”

“I’ll come back for it. Oh sorry Kaylin, I’ll finish my food later so please don’t worry about it. I’ll be back,” she calls behind her as she almost runs down the hall.

Kaylin steps in the room with a curious look on her face, “What was that about?”

“She asked if I wanted to go to the next station with her. Then she just ran out of the room.”

“I assume by the way she was smiling you said yes?” At my nod she continues, “Just don’t break her heart.”

“What? What’s that supposed to mean?”

“I mean it, you break her heart, I break you. She’s very sweet and kind and deserves to be happy.” She turns to walk out of the room.

I watch her leave and can’t figure out what just happened. _Did Kaylin just threaten me? What’s with Qhullani? She’s been extra nice and… she leaned her head on me… does she… isn’t she afraid of me?_

Considering my food I decide to finish eating and lay down. Even though I’ve only been awake for an hour or so, as soon as my head hits the pillow I fall asleep. The dreams that follow are filled with uncertainty and longing.

***


	8. Still Think I'm a Monster?

***

When I wake next, my body feels sore but much better. Stretching I decide to take a shower before going to see the injured soldiers again. Upon exiting the bathroom wrapped in a towel I find another set of clothes.

_The same stuff. Black on black on Velcro patched black._

After dressing I knock on the door to find Henry standing in front of me. “Good morning, Henry. How are you today?”

He gives me a suspicious look before giving me a small smile and saying, “I’m well thanks, how are you? How’re the ribs doing?”

“Better I think,” I put a hand to the sore spot. “I think they’re healing nicely. I’m not too sure though. I know I can breathe and for now I suppose that’s all that matters.”

“That’s good. What can I help you with? Hungry?”

“Yes and no. I’d like to go see the injured soldiers again before I eat. If that’s ok, I mean,” I give a small smile that suggests I’m expecting him to say no.

Looking me up and down slowly, my smile fading with every second that ticks by, he says, “You knew there weren’t any guards to keep you from escaping and you stayed in the room. Why?”

That threw me for a loop. _Where did that come from all of a sudden?_ While thinking about how I want to phrase my answer, Henry folds his arms and waits. “If I tried to escape then nothing I say would have any meaning. The truth would then be meaningless and I would be branded a monster forever. That’s why I didn’t try to escape and why I chose to trust Commander Ellie and Doctor Qhullani. Purely selfish reasoning I know but that’s my reasoning.”

Seeming taken aback by my statement, Henry unfolds his arms slowly. After a few seconds he says with a smile, “I’m happy to hear that. Yes I do believe the Major said you can go visit them again. Would you like to go now or wait for him to take you?”

“I’m assuming the Major is Jason right? I don’t want to bother him any more than I already have. If it’s alright with you, I’d like to go now.”

He raises his eyebrows, “You trust me to stop them if they start beating you again?”

“I trust you to do what you believe is right. If that means letting them kill me then so be it but I need to prove to them I’m not the monster they think I am. I’m only going to let them get out some of their anger. If they still choose to believe I’m a monster then there’s nothing I can do but if there is some way to make them change their minds then I have to try.”

Looking into my face, Henry stands quietly for a moment. “I understand. Let’s go then.” Turning he begins to walk down the hall with only a quick look back at Kaylin.

Another few minutes later has us standing outside the room where the injured soldiers are. I look at Henry and say, “Thank you,” before stepping inside.

The noise in the room dies down as everyone realizes I just walked in. Looking around, I see the shocked look on many of their faces and smile inwardly. I spot the first soldier from last time and walk right up to him, looking him in the eye the whole way.

_He seems nervous. Is he afraid I’m going to attack him?_

I stop a couple feet in front of him and raise my arms outward, “Here I am.”

“Here you are. Why?”

“Why am I here or why am I alive?”

With a sneer he huffs, “Both I suppose but let’s start with the first one.”

“To prove to you I’m not a monster I’ve come back to let you beat me up again. As to why I’m alive, you’ll have to ask Doctor Qhullani. She kept me from dying I hear.”

At the mention of the good doctor his smile fades slightly, “So what? Trying to make her job harder are you?”

“Oh crap, I hadn’t thought about that. I guess I should leave then huh?” I say lowering my arms. The look of surprise on the soldier’s face almost has me laughing. “I suppose you don’t want me to leave though right? So I’ll make it easier for you… I’m innocent. I didn’t do it.”

At my words many of the soldiers stood up and growled like trained dogs being told to prepare to guard. The first soldier merely raises a hand and the noise quiets down. “Still spouting off the same rubbish, huh? And what makes you think we’ll believe you this time?”

“I don’t think you’ll believe me this time-” the soldier gives a short laugh, “-I just don’t care anymore if you do or not. I know the truth and if you want to believe the lies then that’s your right but if I can even get you thinking that they _are_ lies then that’s good for me right? I spent the last five years not knowing if my family is alive, not having a home to return to and not being able to rest because someone framed me for something I didn’t do. Why would I destroy my own home and kill my own family? Why would I then destroy everything on my planet to become a fugitive? Why would anyone do that?”

“Cuz you’re not just anyone!” comes a voice from somewhere to my right.

“Cuz I’m not just anyone, huh?” I rub my face with both hands. “So because I’m not just anyone, I would kill everyone I care about? What sense does that make? Space Fever maybe? You’re thinking I caught Space Fever right? I’ve heard the stories of those who have caught it but I’ve never heard of any of them killing those they love unless they were the only ones around. I didn’t live far enough from the city to shoot my home from space and then move on to other planets. I’m pretty sure those with the fever can’t do anything complicated like I dunno, fly a ship for five years. Or get out of situations that would be deadly to anyone who is inhibited by anything. But you’re telling me I’m the crazy one? Oh wow.”

As I start laughing the soldier steps forward and punches me in the nose. “Shut up. I never said you had Space Fever so just shut up.”

“Oww my nose. Fine, fine, you didn’t say that but come on. What else could possibly lead you to believe I would do any of that?” I slowly turn to look at everyone in the eye before settling my gaze back on the first soldier. “Well? Anything? Nothing? Don’t tell me you’ve decided to start believing me? Just because I came back after the beating you gave me?”

“Don’t worry, it won’t be that easy,” the first soldier says as he pulls his fist back to hit me again. “It’ll take a lot more than that to convince us.”

“Well damn. Ok, here I am. May as well continue where we left off, right?”

“The commander won’t be here to save you this time,” he says just before hitting me in the cheek.

“Nor Jason or Qhullani, I know. Just remember, I’m tired of being called a monster. Otherwise I wouldn’t be here. The sooner I get to see my children again, the better.” I wait for the next hit but it doesn’t come. Realizing I had closed my eyes, I open them to see the first soldier scowling with his fist still raised. “What? What’s the matter? Commander got your arm?”

“Tch, it’s just not fun anymore. Get outta here.”

Nodding I slowly turn to look at everyone before walking back out of the room to face Henry. “What about you, Henry? Anything?”

Henry just shakes his head, turns around and starts walking back the direction we came. As we reach the doorway to my guest quarters he stops and turns to look at me, “You’re an idiot you know that? Those men only wanted to see their families and homes get revenge and now you’ve taken that from them.”

“You’re right, I’m sorry. Should I go back and tell them I’ve been lying the whole time? Make their anger rise again and this time-”

“Such an idiot. That’s not what I’m saying at all. They fought so hard to catch you and now you are here and they can’t do anything more. Their hands are tied because the Commander told them not to lay a finger on you. They aren’t sure who to trust right now but going to them like that, letting them have the opportunity to kill you is a messed up thing to do.”

“I had no idea Ellie told them that!”

“Commander or Commander Eliralazaraz. Not Ellie.”

“Sorry. I didn’t know they were told not to touch me. I just need them to know that I’m not the monster everyone thinks I am. Then again I don’t know what you think of me. Sorry for that.”

“Sorry for what? For not asking my opinion? No you’re not! You’re so tired of hearing from people how despicable you are that you only wanted to deal with one person at a time. I saw how you treated that room, like Jonathon was the only one until he hesitated. I get it, you don’t want to fight on multiple battlefields. That’s all it would be if I felt the same way. You need to stop trying to provoke them.”

“I’m sorry. Really I am. I was just trying to prove to everyone I’m no-”

“Not a monster, yeah I get it and I think they do now too. Your food should be waiting.” Stepping aside he opens the door and I walk into the room, sit down at the table and eat.

I pull out the playing cards and play a couple of games while I eat. After my food is gone I lay down on the bed to take a nap.

_Trying to get people to believe me is not going well. Maybe I should stop trying to prove myself and just be me._

I dream again of Malykai and the only thing going through my half-conscious mind is, “Why? Why do I keep dreaming of you?”

***


	9. Get Ready, It's Time To Go

***

I wake to the hiss of the door opening and light crying. I open my eyes as a chair scrapes the floor. Qhullani is sitting in a chair leaning on the table, her shoulders shaking. Walking over to her, I pull out the chair next to her but before I can sit down she lifts her head and turns towards me. The look of pain in her eyes is agonizing and almost makes me start crying. “What happened?”

She sniffs and breathes deep before answering, “Commander Eliralazaraz said no. She thinks it’ll be too risky to… uh…” Looking away, she seems embarrassed.

“Too risky to let me off the ship,” I finish her thought on a hunch. “To be honest I would have been surprised if she did let me go with you. I’m sorry-”

“I hate that you’re still being treated like a criminal!”

I laugh lightly as I sit next to her and put my hands on hers. “You can’t get mad at her,” she glares at me. “If I’m recognized by any one of the spies the collective has out there it could endanger the entire ship.”

“I know but it’s just so wrong to keep you cooped up on the ship like a common crimin-” she claps her hand to her mouth.

“I don’t think I’m being treated like a ‘common’ criminal but more like the most notorious criminal to ever run from the Collective.”

She glowers at me as she says, “Oh ha-ha. So that basically means you can never leave the ship.” Her eyes start to fill again, “That’s just cruel to do to someone.”

“Well I’m pretty sure no matter what, there’s no way I could even wear a disguise. Unless there’s a masquerade at the next station a mask is out of the question but I’m sure I wouldn’t be invited so that’s still out of the question.”

Qhullani’s eyes widen and her smile returns as she slowly stands. “Oh Rycon you’re a genius.” She cups my face in her hands and kisses my forehead before turning back to the door.

“Obviously not a genius, I did get caught after all. What are you planning? Qhullani?” I call after her as she strides swiftly from the room.

Once again, Kaylin walks into the room. Smiling she says, “She seems better, what did you say to her?”

“I told her the only way I’d be let off the ship is if I can wear a mask which won't happen unless there’s a masquerade.”

Kaylin smiles, nods and turns back to the hall, “I hope you have some talent at dancing.” With a snicker, she adds, “You’re gonna need it.”

_Shit, what the hell did I get myself into? What am I going to do? I don’t even remember the last time I went dancing._

A thought has me striding toward the hallway. Knocking, I wait a moment before Kaylin opens the door and asks, “What’s up? Need lessons?” She laughs lightly.

“Yes. I mean kind of, yes.” I shake my head and continue, “Can you ask Jason to come by when he gets some time, please?”

The look of shock on Kaylin’s face at my admission has me holding back laughter. “Uh… Yes of course. I’ll see if he’s available,” she turns back to the hall and walks away. She glances over her shoulder once before the door shuts.

After some time of pacing the room, drinking some water and relieving myself, the door slides open. I jump as the hiss of the door sneaks up on me and Jason walks in and I wave at him. _Really? A wave? Why do I feel so nervous?_ Feeling even more foolish with that out there I say, “Hi, thanks for coming so quickly. I really appreciate it.”

“Of course,” he smiles and puts his jacket over the back of a chair. “So a little birdy told me you may need some help with dancing.”

I sigh, “Yeah. I haven’t been in a long time and I’m hoping to not make a complete fool of myself, or Qhullani for that matter.”

Jason nods, “Well, I’m no expert but I know the steps to a few dances. You ready? I don’t think there’s much time left before we get to the next station.”

Taking a deep breath, I nod to Jason and try to memorize the dance steps of the first dance he teaches me.

_I thought he was just a soldier who knew a few dances but it turns out he’s an avid ballroom dancer. He said he wasn’t an expert but I’m not so sure. These dances are anything but simple, yet they have similar rhythms. This may be easier than I thought._

After what seems like days he stops and looks at me, “How about we take a break? Get some water and we’ll go through it again.”

Suddenly I realize how dry my mouth is so I grab the water and glasses, pour two and hand one to Jason. “I’m not keeping you from something am I?”

Jason’s cup stops inches from his lips for a few seconds before he takes a drink. “How do you mean?”

The question puts me back on my heels for a moment. “Well, I mean, you’re not supposed to be helping Commander Ellie with anything or something else really important are you? I’d prefer not to get you in trouble for trying to teach me how to dance.”

He laughs, “What do you mean trying? You’re getting the steps down quite well, in fact, you’re doing so well I was thinking you already knew how to dance. Perhaps you forgot you knew how to while you were running but it seems to me you don’t need anything more than a refresher course.” He laughs some more as he takes another drink of his water. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’ve been dancing your way out of trouble!”

I laugh with him, a little less enthusiastically, “Oh is that so? Well isn’t that all a fight really is? A dance with fists or guns?”

“Yes, I do believe so. Well then, after that nice laugh shall we continue?”

“Alright, I’m ready, let’s go,” I say with more confidence than I’m feeling. _If I’m so good at dancing maybe, I’ll be ok with Qhullani._ Another couple hours go by while we go through more steps of dances before a thought comes to mind. “What kind of music will they have at this masquerade?” I ask Jason.

He stops, puts his hand to his chin and thinks. “Well usually a masquerade will have classical type of music playing so the dances we’re going over now should be fine.”

“That doesn’t sound too convincing. It sounds like there’s a ‘but’ in there somewhere.”

Jason looks over at me and gives a small chuckle, “No I’m sure these dances will be fine.”

“But…”

With a look, Jason says, “But there are some people on this station that like to throw in some more modern dance music. It’s kind of funny we were talking about dancing and fighting because the music they play is dance fighting tempo and usually accompanied by a show of dance fighters. It’s interesting to watch and very exhilarating to participate in.”

“Dance fighting? That sounds like a lot of fun. What’s it called?” As he opens his mouth to answer the door hisses open revealing Ellie and her scowl. _She looks a little irritated._ “How are you today, Commander?” I ask before anything else can happen.

The look of irritation passed from her face to show slight surprise for a moment before returning to her original look. “I’m fine thank you for asking, or at least I will be once you talk some sense in to Qhullani,” she pauses to let her words sink in before continuing. “You need to tell her you won’t go to the masquerade with her.”

“Why?”

“Because you can’t be seen at a dance party or even off this ship for that matter. I don’t know what she was thinking inviting you to go with her, but I can’t allow it.”

“So, if you can’t allow it then why do _I_ have to tell her I won’t go with her? Why not just tell her no instead?” The glare she gave me at that comment was icy and told me I already knew why. I did but I wanted her to say it out loud. I wasn’t going to take the fall for something as petty as her wanting to stay in good standing with Qhullani.

Ellie glares at me harder, daring me to deny her this. Staring back, I try to make my expression show a look of pure defiance. As her face seems to get a darker shade of red every second, I start to smile ever so slightly until finally, I can’t help it, something about this situation strikes me as hilarious. Soon my smile is so broad I start laughing. “What’s so funny?” Ellie growls at me.

Turning around, I do my best to stifle my laughter, breathing deeply to try and calm down. The look on her face had been murderous. “Ha-ha, nothing, it’s nothing! So back to your statement and my question. You want me to be the bad guy, why?” Without more than a second’s pause, I continue, “Wait don’t tell me, you want me to be ‘The Bad Guy’ right?” I add in air quotes to emphasize the label. When I turn back to look at her again, I meet her glare with my own. This time though, I’m not laughing. “I’m tired of being ‘The Bad Guy.’ I don’t want to feel that way anymore and if this is one step towards that end then I must take it at any cost. If anything goes wrong, well then, I will resume my role once again. However, if I can start down a different path, I have no other choice. If you don’t like it then kill me now.” While speaking I walk slowly and deliberately closer to Ellie until I’m inches away.

“Ahem,” suddenly broke the silence that followed my rant, startling Ellie and me. She spins around and I jump back only to see Qhullani standing in the open doorway. “I hope I’m not interrupting.”

“Qhullani for the love of the cosmos, don’t sneak up on me like that!” the Commander squeals, clutching her chest and breathing hard.

Laughing a little uncertainly, Qhullani looks at the Commander then to Jason and finally to me. “It seems I missed the invitation to this little party. May I ask what this little get together is about?” She hesitates a moment looking from person to person. “If it’s about my request then I deserve to be here. So…”

“I don’t have anything to wear to the party and I was hoping Jason could help me out with that,” I throw out quickly. Looking over at him, I add, “Sorry I forgot to ask about that too.”

Jason glances at me and nods, “I may have something.”

Ellie spins around making her long hair cover her face for a moment before she glares at Jason who looks towards the ceiling. Her face reddening again, this time with more of a pink hue, she turns deliberately back to Qhullani, “Qhullani, Rycon can’t go with you to the masquerade. He’s a wanted fugitive that is supposed to be dead. If he is seen, we can all become ‘Enemies of the State’ and lose everything. Is that something you’re willing to risk?”

As I listen to Ellie speak, my mind starts to run through everything I’ve been through and how much I wanted it to change. I hated being on the run and worst of all, one time I thought I found somewhere I could stay, but it turned out the people just wanted to collect my bounty. When Ellie finishes speaking, I look up to see Qhullani looking at the ground with a very sad and upset look on her face.

For about a minute everyone just stands silent, watching Qhullani until she finally spoke, “I know.” I look away, trying not to think about how bad she must feel right now. As someone in the room takes a deep breath and releases it slowly, Qhullani continues, “I know he can’t be seen and I know it would be bad for all of us if he is, but I don’t care. I’m willing to give up everything to not become like the Collective. I’m willing to help someone who deserves compassion and respect. You may know what he has gone through from what he’s said but there’s so much he’s left out that should never have happened to him. Loses and hardships that have turned him into who he is now can only be described as terrible. I’m not willing to keep him in prison to save my own neck.”

While she speaks, I can’t help but stare at her in surprise. _Do I deserve to have a friend like her?_ Suddenly the room is silent an I only realize Qhullani is done speaking when Ellie takes a step back, away from Qhullani. The sudden movement catches me so off guard I feel my heart skip a beat. Looking back at Qhullani, I see her eyes are shiny as though she is about to cry. Without thinking I walk up to her and hug her. I hold her for what seemed to me several minutes but, must have only been a few seconds because as I pulled away, I could feel Qhullani’s arms just start to wrap around me. The look in her eyes when I backed up further was of shock and admiration. This look didn’t last long after I started speaking. “No. No, I won’t go to the masquerade with you. I won’t let anyone else suffer for me, least of all you, Qhullani. I would hate myself if I ever allowed you to be hurt in that way. I want so badly to go with you and enjoy spending time with you, but if it means you could get hurt or lose everything,” I shake my head, “I can’t do it. You are too kind a person for me to take a risk like that. Thank you so much for being who you are, I truly appreciate everything you have done for me.”

As I speak, the hurt falls across her face like the sun disappearing from a beautiful summer turning into stormy night. My heart starts to break as I watch this change happen. Feeling tears start to form in my eyes, I turn and walk into the bathroom.

After a while, I turn on the shower, strip down and jump in to stand under the water which isn’t even warm yet. Shivering for the first few seconds, I can’t help but feel like an idiot. _That was my chance to get off the ship without being in cuffs or something. How stupid can I be? _Out loud I say to myself, “I broke her heart. I really am an idiot.”

“Yes, you are.”

The voice, which came from inside the bathroom, was so unexpected I jumped and slipped on the wet floor only managing to catch myself due to the small space of the shower. “Wha-” Before I could say anything else the curtain is thrown open to reveal Ellie. “What the hell are you doing?”

“You broke Qhullani’s heart. Now she’s decided she doesn’t want to stay on the ship which means I’m losing my best doctor! On top of that,” she turns and walks over to the counter, places her hands on the edge and bows her head with a tremendous sigh. “On top of that she has two tickets to this thing, and she says no matter what I have to go. Even when she’s angry she still thinks of others. She truly is someone I can’t afford to lose. Not just for her medical abilities but for her personality and empathy. I can’t believe I’m going to say this but I’m ordering- no I’m begging you,” she turns to face me again, “to please go to the party with her. Please.” At this she bows her head with a sad look on her face.

I’m so shocked I can’t speak. For one thing, I’m still leaning against the wet shower wall, for two the water is still running. Finally, for the third thing, I’m completely naked trying to make sense of what just happened. “I-”

“Great I’ll leave you to finish then.” She straightens and strides out of the room as though nothing happened.

As the door closes, I slide down to the floor of the shower. I close my eyes to keep the water out of them and, to no one in particular, say, “What the hell just happened?”

I finish my shower to find clean white clothes laid out on the table outside the bathroom. Among them, a black mask and a white cape or cloak or something. As I put it on over my shoulders and investigate the mirror, I notice it falls to my knees but doesn’t fit quite right. Setting it aside I put on the rest of the white clothes; pants, collared shirt and comfortable white dress shoes. As I look at myself in the mirror, I put the mask on. The black mask contrasts the white clothes nicely, with a black feather rising from the top right corner I can’t help but think it looks like it’s missing the feather on the other side. Walking into the main room trying to figure out how the cape thing sits on my shoulders with so much string, I’m greeted by a cacophony of cheers and applause. My heart skips several beats at the sudden sound, and I would have run back into the bathroom had I not fallen backwards, tripping over the chair that just happened to be there. “What the hell?”

The fall agitates my ribs somewhat and before I can recover, I open my eyes to look up into the smiling face of Jason as he reaches out his hand to help me up. “Sorry, we didn’t mean to startle you. We’re all just excited that you decided to go with Qhullani to the masquerade.”

“Who’s ‘we’?” I ask taking his hand and standing up as straight as my ribs will allow. I look across the room to find a few of the injured soldiers in a group with a few uninjured solders standing there with big goofy smiles on their faces.

Before I could say anything else the door opens and Ellie walks in. Shocked out of their excitement, the soldiers stand as straight as they can and give a salute to the Commander. She walks up to me, a scowl on her face, takes the cloth from my hands, lifts my left arm and ties the thing so it is slung under my left armpit and over my right shoulder, the whole while with a glare that could destroy a battle cruiser. When she’s finished, the cape covers the left side of my body under my arm.

_I never would have guessed that’s how it’s supposed to be worn._

Ellie steps back and looks me up and down before her gaze settles on my face. She smiles and says, “Thank you.” Then she turns and strides out of the room.

The shocked silence lasts for a few more seconds before loud voices and laughter begin to fill the room. “Now,” Jason says in my right ear, “It’s time to go talk to Qhullani.”

He takes me to the door and as we walk past the soldiers, some of them smile and give nods of encouragement while others slap my shoulder and give me a good shake. As the door opens, Kaylin steps in front of me, looking me up and down. She smiles through her glare and says, “Remember what I said Rycon?”

Looking down at the floor, I mutter, “Yeah,” waiting to be slapped or something worse but nothing happens. I slowly look up into her face as I adjust my voice to give her the proper answer she is waiting to hear, I say, “Yes I do and I’m going to make it right.”

She nods and steps to the side, “Then you better hurry. I hear we should be in range to dock soon. Wouldn’t want to be late for your date, now would you?”

Sighing in relief, I start walking with the feeling of being in a dream. With Jason giving me small nudges and pokes to help me find my way, it only took about five minutes to stop in front of Qhullani’s door. Suddenly my mouth is dry, and I feel chilly. _Why am I so nervous?_

After a few moments of just standing at the door, I hear from behind me, “Well?” At first, I thought it was Jason before I realize the voice was too feminine to be his. Then I notice Jason is standing next to me, so I look back to find the group of soldiers and Kaylin standing there looking at me with expectant faces. Kaylin has her hands clasped in front of her with a look of hopefulness. The soldiers almost look like they’re about to start crying.

Turning back to the door, I raise my hand and knock three times. I step back and wait a moment for Qhullani to open the door but instead of Qhullani, it’s Ellie who opens the door. “Oh, it’s you,” I say before catching myself. “I mean… sorry.”

She just smiles and turns inside the room. “Qhullani, I have one last reason for you to stay. I have four tickets to the masquerade.”

“Ha! And how am I to do that? I don’t _want_ to go with just anyone. No offense to everyone who offered but I wanted to go with Rycon. Wait what do you mean? Why four of them?”

“I’m going also, so, if I have to go then so do you.”

“And who are our magical dates supposed to be for this double date of yours?” walking into view Qhullani looks at Ellie with her hands on her hips then to the doorway where Jason and I are standing, I with my mask on and Jason with a look of confusion. Turning back the way she had just come from she disappears and from around the corner says, “Ten minutes.”

“Better hurry, I’m pretty sure we’ll be in range of the station by then,” Ellie says turning back to us. “You heard her, ten minutes.” With a small wave of finality, she closes the door which hisses shut in front of us. From behind me, I hear cheering and stomping. Then the door opens again, “Oh by the way, Jason, I hope you have a mask cuz you’re my date for this thing.”

Before he could say anything, the door closes again. I look at him and say, “I was wondering who she was planning on taking but now it makes sense.” The cheering, which had died down quite quickly when the door reopened, suddenly sprang back to life with more force than the first time. “Should we go back to my room or to yours?”

Speechless, Jason just starts walking so I follow him down a new hall. Soon we arrive at a door that he opens before spinning around with a bit of fear in his eyes. He splutters before taking a deep breath and saying, “Di- did that really just happen?”

“Yeeess. Are you ok?”

He splutters some more before turning and walking into his room and says, “Crap I don’t know if I have anything to wear. What am I going to do?”

Before I could answer or move the door slides shut in front of me. I look around to see what I should do but no one is around. _The other soldiers must have stopped following us and if I try to get back to my room by myself, I’m pretty sure I’ll get lost. Better to just stay here and wait for him to be done._

As I look around the hall I decide to lean up against the wall opposite Jason’s door. Then I hear footsteps coming closer, so I stand up straight. As the steps get closer, I notice they are coming from the left of me. I look over as a soldier rounds the corner a little way down the hall who stops for only a moment before walking more slowly the rest of the way. I raise my hand in greeting and he reciprocates the gesture warily. “How goes it?” I ask.

“Well enough I’d say, and yourself? Waiting for the Major, are you?” the soldier tilts his head toward Jason’s door.

“Yes, he and I have plans on the station.”

“Ah, well then I’m sure you both will be happy to hear we’re ready to head to the station now so as soon as he’s ready –”

At that moment Jason’s door slides open, making both the soldier and I jump slightly. “Rycon why are you out here? Get in here and help me.”

I look over at the soldier who is now staring at me, eyes wide and speechless. “Well it was nice talking to you,” I say before hurrying through the door which closes behind me.

“Which shirt looks more casual but still somewhat formal?” he asks while holding up a red collared shirt and a deep blue.

_Other than the color they both look the same._ “Um, what color is El- I mean the Commander wearing?”

“Shit that’s a good point! I hadn’t thought about that.”

“Not that she gave you any time to ask anyways. Maybe the soldier outside can find out for you?”

Almost running to the door, and almost into it, he spins around in the hallway a couple times before yelling, “Hey Jimmy, come here for a second! I need to ask a huge favor of you. I need to know what color Commander Eliralazaraz is planning on wearing. Please hurry.”

I can hear the quick steps leaving as Jason walks back in the room. “I do like the blue one though. It is a darker shade without being too dark. Kind of mysterious you know? If Jimmy there can’t find out or she’s wearing a color you don’t have this will be your best bet, I think. Not too flashy or formal.”

“Thanks, Rycon. Really,” he straightens, grabbing both my shoulders and staring into my eyes, “Thank you for everything.”

Trying to figure out his sudden serious mood I barely manage to smile, “Of course, it was nothing.”

After a few minutes a knock on the door makes both of us jump. Practically running to the door, Jason opens it and we see Jimmy standing there a little out of breath. “I think the dress she picked out is a light blue however she hadn’t put one on yet.”

“Did she have any red dresses?” I ask from inside the room.

Jimmy glances over at me, gives me a glare that told me, ‘I’m not talking to you,’ before looking back at Jason and continuing, “I only saw the light blue and a black dress or two.”

“Thank you, Jimmy. I appreciate you checking for me.” Turning back to me he says with more confidence than he seemed to have only moments ago, “Well I guess you were right, Rycon. Blue it is.”

The look on Jimmy’s face when Jason told me I was right could have been deadly if it were more than a look. “Sir.” Jason stops walking to look back, “Why is _he_ here? Shouldn’t he be locked up?”

Jason looks at me as my gaze slides to the floor. I’m not diluted enough to think everyone believes my story, but it still hurts when I hear them voice their opinions.

“Because I asked him to be here and help me. Why else would he be here? Thank you for your help Jimmy.” I hear steps coming towards me and then, “Well now what I need is a mask, ha-ha.”

After the door slides shut, I look up to find Jason smiling at me. Uncertain about how to ask what I really want to, I ask, “So where are you going to get a mask from? Is there a shop or something along the way to the masquerade?”

He laughs a little more before answering, “It wouldn’t be a very popular masquerade if they didn’t help to provide items their guests may be missing. The event itself will have a place I can pick up a mask. Other than a mask though, I’m all set. Now I just need to get changed.”

“I’ll step outside to give you some privacy,” I tell him as I start towards the door.

Before I reach the door, he, says, “Are you sure you want to be out there? More soldiers might walk by. It wouldn’t do to have your clothes torn because of a scuffle.”

“I suppose you’re right.” Hesitating at the door I look back at Jason, “Besides Jimmy, I don’t think any of the other soldiers know I’m anywhere but, in my room, and certainly not dressed up. I wonder if I could make it to the bridge dressed like this. What do you think?” At Jason’s look of astonishment, I can’t help but laugh, “I’m just kidding, I wouldn’t do that without a good reason. And besides, I don’t even know how to get there from here. Or anywhere for that matter.”

Now Jason starts laughing, although it does have a hint of uncertainty, as he reflects my words, “I suppose you’re right. Well you know you’re always welcome to stay in here.”

“Thanks, Jason.” Then a thought came to mind, “Hey will there be food?”

Jason stumbles for a moment as he grabs for his clothes hanging on a chair, “Are you hungry? We should have time to get a quick bite before we head out.”

“Oh no I’m fine for now I just wasn’t sure.”

“Oh ok, I do believe food will be available as a buffet style finger food set up. Something casual and quick.”

Nodding I watch Jason walk to the bathroom on the other side of the room with his clothes. A couple minutes later he steps out wearing black pants and the deep blue shirt. It reminds me of the deep ocean of my home planet. “Wow you look great. So now the only thing you need is-”

A sudden knock at the door makes me jump and spin around to see what’s coming. I realize it’s someone outside the door and I can feel my face burning. Feeling like a fool I glance back at Jason whose eyes are wide but doesn’t say anything to me. Instead he says loudly, “Enter.”

The door slides open to reveal the Commander who is wearing a powder blue dress, dark blue high heels and has a black bow holding up her long blonde hair. As she steps in the room, I notice she also does not have a mask. When she looks over to Jason her eyes widen for a moment before she says, “Good you have something nice to wear, I’m glad.” The beginning of her sentence had a bit of a squeak, possibly from astonishment.

Before she steps further into the room, I can’t help but see her cheeks seem to be a little red._ There’s something up._ Looking past Ellie, I see a short black dress and black shoes standing in the doorway. Qhullani is wearing a white mask with one feather sticking out of the top left corner, the exact opposite of what I am wearing.

“Wow,” is the only thing I manage to say.

The look on Qhullani’s face told me how happy she is to have heard my reaction. Still grinning she asks, “You like it? Ellie picked everything out.”

“Very much,” my voice is lower than I meant so I clear my throat. “You look amazing.”

Blushing furiously, Qhullani looks down to her right. Just then, Ellie and Jason step into my view making me jump a little. _I can’t believe I’d forgotten they were in the room._

“Well,” Ellie looks from Qhullani to me and finally to Jason with a smile. “Are we ready to go?”

“Go?” Everyone looks at me with surprise on their faces. “I mean, yes of course I’m ready.”

Ellie and Jason step around Qhullani and head out the door. As I walk over to Qhullani, she frowns a bit. “What-”

“Sorry, my mind just blanked after I saw you standing there. You look amazing.”

The white of her mask suddenly takes on a pink tint as her face turns bright red. Before she could respond another voice calls out, “Let’s go you two! We don’t have all day!”

Smiling I yell back, “Yes mom!” in my best impression of an annoyed teenager’s voice. Qhullani covered her mouth to keep from laughing. Walking next to her, I lift my right elbow and ask, “Shall we?”

Taking my arm, she smiles and faces the open doorway, “Let’s be on our way then.”

***


	10. The Masquerade

***

The masquerade has many, many people in attendance. The main ballroom floor has almost no room to dance or even stand on without bumping into someone else. As the four of us step inside the main double doors, the heat and noise hit us hard. The gentleman at the door informs us the cooling unit is giving them trouble and should be fixed soon. Just inside the doors to the right we see a small door with the label ‘Shop’ above it. Ellie and Jason head towards it and I lean closer to Qhullani to ask if she’d like to follow them.

Nodding she says, “I’d like to see what they have available.”

As we step into the much cooler shop’s interior, the smell of clean leather and cloth is so strong I almost sneeze. This small shop has a surprising number of masks, hats, capes and other articles of clothing. It seems that steam punk has made a serious comeback as at least half the items I see just from the doorway have some version of gold, bronze or silver wheels and cogs on them. As far as I knew the steam punk age had died out a long time ago but now, “Wow.”

As the door closes behind me, Qhullani looks back at my wide-eyed expression and laughs lightly, “Are you ok?”

Grabbing my hand, she gives it a small squeeze and gentle pull. The sudden feeling of her gaze on me brought my gaze back to her. “Yeah I’m good, I just wasn’t expecting so much steam punk.”

She giggles and pulls me further into the shop. A moment later we are greeted by a happy slightly shrill voice, “Hello my fellow masqueraders! How are you doing today?” To my astonishment a short man passes Ellie and Jason and walks right up to Qhullani and I, “How may I help you today?”

The man has on a gold steam punk styled mask with black gears for the eye holes. A black chain that seems to be hanging from the left side of the mask, off the gears and flows smoothly to the other side under his nose only to connect to gear of the right eye. Looking closely, I see a small gear that resembles a nose ring. The jacket is designed much the same way, with bits and pieces of gold scrap metal seemingly hanging from the cloth. More gears and chains look to be spinning along his torso.

Looking from Ellie and Jason to the masked and well-dressed man, I gesture to them and say, “We’re here to help our friends find masks.”

“Oh, how delightful! What color and style would you like to get for them? I ask you because you two will be the ones looking at them all night and if you don’t like what you see then it won’t work out.” Qhullani laughs a little at this. “Well its true isn’t it? Unless you plan on ditching them the moment you step out of here, which would be fine of course. It is a masquerade, right? By the way, I hope I’m not crossing a line when I say, you two look so lovely together. The little Yin and Yang couple, it’s so adorable. So how long have you been together?”

Taken aback, neither of us spoke for a minute until Qhullani starts to say, “We- uh-”

“Oh dear, don’t be rude and start prying into their lives. Don’t mind him otherwise soon he’ll be asking if you’d like to come by for his birthday. My name is Elisabeth, you can call Elisa or Lisa or Beth, and my husband there is Dunkin. His friends call him _Dumbkin_ though.” She laughs lightly. “Thank you for visiting our shop. What can we do for you lovely folks?” a woman appears from the back of the shop waving one hand at the man in a sweeping motion. Dressed much the same way as her husband only with silver gears and chains she steps next to Jason and Ellie, seemingly not seeing them.

“Sweetheart I was only making small talk. And they’re looking for masks for their friends. I was just getting to the style and color they’ll need,” says Dunkin looking back towards his wife.

Qhullani looks over at me, eyes wide under the mask, unsure of what to do so I jump in again suspecting they are playing a game with the two of them, “it’s nice to meet you Beth and Dunkin. I suppose their clothing style is like ours. Her dress is light blue, and he has a dark blue shirt on.”

With his hand on his chin, Dunkin ponders for a moment, “Is her dress short also or floor length?”

“And what of the shoes? Comfortable flats or heels?” Beth chimes in.

This time Qhullani jumps in, “Ankle length with dark blue heels and a black bow holding back her hair.”

“He has black shoes and pants if that makes a difference,” Ellie says loudly. When neither of the two shopkeepers turn to look at her or even acknowledge that she said anything, she throws her arms in the air and turns away.

“So, a light blue dress and a dark blue shirt.” Dunkin starts to walk around the racks and picks out a few masks and shows them to us, holding them about chest high, “Would any of these look good with the dress?” One is a sky blue, much lighter than Ellie’s dress, and one is so dark it must be black or at least a deep purple. The final mask has dark and light blue swirls on it along with what looks like cat ears at the top.

_It seems like he’s trying to hide them from Ellie and Jason. This must be more of a game to them than I originally thought._

I point to the third mask with the cat ears and smile. “This one looks like it’ll match both. What do you think?” I ask looking over to Qhullani.

Nodding, she looks from the mask to me and says, “I agree. Should we even ask them what they think or just make them wear it?” she laughs softly as Ellie makes a scoffing sound.

“I’m thinking we should just make them wear it. I think they’ll love it.” Turning back to Dunkin I say, “We’ll get them this one.”

“Excellent choice! Now if you’ll just come over here with me, we can get everything handled.” Walking all the way to the edge of the room to go around Ellie and Jason, we make it to the counter only to find Beth already waiting for us.

“Oh, wonderful choice. It just so happens I have the match right here,” and she pulls out an identical mask from under the counter.

_They had this planned out somehow, I’m sure of it._

“Oh, how wonderful!” Qhullani exclaims. “I’m sure they’ll love them. How much are they?”

The steampunk adorned couple look at each other and smile. Turning back to us they begin in unison, “Tell you what-”

Looking back at each other in surprise they laugh, and Beth continues speaking, “Tell you what, if you want to play a game with us, they’ll be free.”

Intrigued I ask, “What kind of game?”

This time Dunkin jumps in, “Oh nothing too difficult. We would just like you to get a mask from someone.”

“Huh, and who would this someone be?” Qhullani asks cautiously.

“Oh no one of any true consequence, just a commander on vacation. He’s wearing an old mask that I’ve tried to fix for him for a long time, but he refuses to allow me to work on it. Every year he shows up and I ask for the opportunity but every year he says no. I’m afraid it’ll be beyond repair soon so I ask if you can help me out with this. At this point I’d even wave my usual fee just to get the chance to work on it,” Dunkin says with an almost pleading tone in his voice and even his face.

His words obviously affect Qhullani because she says, “Ok, we’ll do it. Don’t you worry, we will think of something.”

Dunkin gives us a huge toothy smile, “Oh thank you so much. Truly I am in your debt. Here are the masks and I hope you and your friends have a wonderful night!”

Taking the masks, Qhullani’s smile shows through her white mask with such vibrant emotion, I can’t help but smile with her.

_She really is very beautiful when she smiles._

As Qhullani turns away to give the masks to Ellie and Jason, I ask, “So who is this Commander and what does his mask look like?”

Dunkin looks surprised for a moment before answering, “Well I’m not sure what his name is but his mask is a beautiful black and white early steam punk design with two cogs for the eyes. The mask covers ear to ear with a silver chain connected to his left ear that stretches to the nose. It’s elegant in its simple design.”

From behind me I hear a small gasp. Turning I see a wide eyed Qhullani staring at Dunkin. “Are you ok?” I ask.

Qhullani just stares at Dunkin a little longer before, “Oh I’m sorry no it’s nothing. Are we ready to go?”

“Yeah I’m pretty sure I can remember the details.” As I try to ask her what’s wrong, she just turns toward the door. Giving Dunkin and his wife a quick once over, I take long steps to catch up with Qhullani.

Walking next to her into the noise and bustle of the main room, I just wait for her to say something. As the music changes from a fast, upbeat song to a slow and steady rhythmic one however, I grab her elbow startling her out of her thoughts. Turning toward me her eyes show a bit of fear and surprise, so I pull her close, one hand on her hip and the other still holding her elbow. To try and ease her tension I start to rock slowly in a circle. Every step I take I pull her hip a little closer until her eyes relax and she puts her arms up around my neck, closing the distance between us.

For the next few minutes nothing else seems to happen. As the song winds up to a faster song, Qhullani’s grip doesn’t loosen around my neck. She stops moving and for a minute I think she may cry with her face tucked into my neck. As I open my mouth to ask her if she’s ok, she suddenly stands up straight and announces, “I can’t do this.”

Shaking her head, she turns to walk away but I hold her hips in place. Leaning closer to her I ask, as gently as I can, “Can’t do this with me?”

My eyes must have shown hurt because when she looks back at me her eyes begin to mist, “No that’s not what I meant. I… I… just can’t help you get the mask.” Her face falls as she looks down. “I can’t see him. Not now.”

“Him? You know who this guy is?”

“Yes, and I can’t help get his mask. I’m sorry.”

Thinking for a moment I put my hand to her cheek to look into her eyes. Smiling I say, “Ok. Then we just make a run for it.”

Shock jumps across her face, “Run what do you mean?”

“I mean run so we don’t have to pay for the masks. Ha-ha come on let’s go before they think about us again.”

I take a step toward the big double doors, but she grabs my wrists, “We can’t do that, it’s not right!”

“Oh, I know that, but I can’t do it alone. I’m sure Ellie and Jason can figure it out on their own, so why not? Let’s at least get off the dance floor so we can talk without being run into, ok? I think the buffet is over there.”

“But wait. You’re not going to ask me why?”

“Why?” looking up toward the ceiling I pretend to think before looking into her eyes dramatically, “Why… does it matter? If you don’t want or can’t do it then who am I to say anything?” The look of surprise on her face slowly morphed to admiration. “Besides, I’d rather you told me when you’re ready instead of after my prying into the reason.”

“Well I appreciate that,” she says as she steps closer and kisses my cheek. “Ok let’s go over there. I’m kind of thirsty.”

As we walk through the crowd to the side room with the buffet table, Qhullani leading the way, I catch a glimpse of Ellie’s light blue dress. She appears to be speaking with someone who has on a black and white mask. With my attention peeked I turn towards them to try and get a better look. As I slow down, I pull Qhullani to a stop. When she sees where I’m looking, she gasps and almost runs through the crowd into the buffet room covering the side of her face as she goes. I follow as quickly as I can until I walk up behind her in a dark corner of the room.

When I put my hands on her shoulders she jumps and spins around to face me. The look in her eyes reminds me of a scared animal caught in a corner, until her eyes focus on me and I see her usual strength and confidence rising in them again. My question lingers on my tongue as I open my mouth, while her shoulders shiver under my hands. What I meant to ask fades into a completely different question, and instead I ask, “How did he hurt you?”

The look of surprise on her face is painful for me to see. Here is a woman I know to be strong and confident, brought to tears and hiding in a corner. Instead of waiting for an answer, I pull her to me and just hold her until her shivering stops.

“He’s my father.”

Surprise freezes me and when she pulls away to look at me, I barely notice.

“He’s my father and he didn’t do anything to me. I’m the one who did something. Or rather I didn’t do anything.”

Snapping back to myself I look at Qhullani to find her looking away with an expression of shame on her face. “Its fine really, you don’t have to tell me. Really, I’m the last person-”

“I want to tell you,” the look of determination in her eyes as she turns to face me hits like a slap in the mouth. “I want to tell you but I… I’m just not sure…”

“I get it and its fine. When you’re ready to tell someone, I’ll be here to listen.” When she opens her mouth to protest, I put my hand on her cheek and say, “Knowing you, you did everything you could do. That’s all anyone can ever ask.”

Her look of unease lightens as she says, “I’m glad you’re here Rycon. Thank you for sticking around.”

“Oh, well I’ve seen many chances for me to run but they just never seemed the right time. Don’t worry though, I’m sure the right one will arrive soon.”

In response to my sarcastic statement, she smacks my chest and laughs lightly, “Oh you _are_ bad.”

“Qhullani?”

The voice makes both of us jump. Standing in the entryway to the buffet room is a man with broad shoulders, athletic build that is made more obvious by his almost form fitting white shirt and black jacket. His black dress pants flow gently about his legs as his dress shoes clip clop into the room. As the man steps further into the room, the light falls upon his face, revealing a black and white mask.

“F… Father, I mean Commander,” nervousness accompanies her words as she stammers out a greeting.

“No please don’t Qhullani. I’ve never expected you to greet me so formally,” he says, arms outstretched as though trying to calm a frightened animal.

“I, um, I’m sorry… How are you doing?” she stutters as she nervously wrings her hands together.

“Ha I’m doing well thank you for asking. How have you been doing these past few years? I’ve missed you,” the Commander says.

“I’ve been doing well. Just working hard.”

“I hope you’re not working too much, Qhullani. It’s no good if you don’t get out every once and while. Oh, and who is this with you?” he gestures to me with a less than happy smile.

“Oh, um, this… this is…” as she looks over at me with fear in her eyes, I realize our mistake; we covered my face but not my name.

“Good evening Sir, I’m… Malykai. It’s wonderful to finally meet you in person. I only wish we could have planned it, ha-ha,” smiling at the commander, I put as much sincerity as I could into my words. The look of surprise on the commander’s face is priceless and I must force myself not to laugh.

“Oh, yes of course. That would have been nice. I’m sure my daughter forgot I come to this masquerade every year otherwise this would have been a pleasant meeting instead of such an awkward one.”

“Ha-ha well to be honest sir, I think it may have been awkward anyways.”

“Oh? And why is that?”

“Well I only just heard Qhullani’s father is a commander right before you showed up,” I spoke honestly, I know I did but it almost feels like a lie. As the commander opens his mouth to respond, the fast-paced violin music that had been playing changes to a slow song with only a piano playing. “Oh, I love this song. I apologize Commander,” turning to Qhullani I continue, “Will you dance with me again?”

Ignoring her look of shock, I take her hand and, looking back at the commander with a smile, extend my hand, “It was lovely meeting you Sir. Perhaps we can continue this conversation in a bit. By the way the strap on your mask looks to be fraying. May I suggest the shop near the entrance? They have a wonderful selection and are excellent at mending items.”

As I walk past him almost dragging Qhullani before she figures out what’s going on and begins walking on her own, I hear the Commander mutter, “Thank you, I’ll look into it.”

Out on the dance floor I let Qhullani walk in front of me and pull her close. Leaning down slightly, I ask, “Are you ok?” As she takes a step back to peer into my face, I instead grab her hand and push her hip away just enough to spin her around and pull her close again. This time, her back is to me and I lean down again to speak into her ear, “That must have been a bit difficult and I’m sorry. We don’t have to talk to him again if you don’t feel comfortable with it. We could just dance to a few more songs and then head out to the ship if that would help you feel better?” While I’m talking, I can feel her body shiver as though she’s cold.

Before I can ask her if she’s cold, a hand grabs the back of my shirt and a smallish voice cuts into the quieting music, “Are you my sister’s boyfriend?”

Both Qhullani and I yelp, jump and spin around to see a girl of about fifteen years standing in front of us. Hearing snickers I look around to see that we now have an audience. Everyone around us has stopped their conversations and dancing to view the result of the sudden noise. As we just stare at the girl who is obviously, and impatiently waiting for an answer, she repeats herself, “Well, are you my sister’s boyfriend or not?”

All I can manage is a pathetic, “Uh…”

“Zolani!” the new voice cuts in before anyone can speak. Tearing my gaze toward the new voice, I see the owner of the voice isn’t new at all. Ellie walks up, leans down and hugs the girl tightly. “It’s been so long since I saw you last, Zolani. You’ve gotten so big too. How are you?”

“Aunt Ellie! I’m good. I’m jus-”

“How’s school going? I hope you’re still working hard and showing everyone how tough you are.”

“Yeah Aunty, I only get bullied now because my grades are better the-”

“That’s good you don’t want to let anyone bully you for any other reason. You know you can always call if they get too bad.”

“Yeah Aunty, I know thanks. Can I ask you something?”

“Sure Zo, what’s up?”

Turning back to Qhullani and I she says, “Is he Qhullani’s boyfriend?”

“NO!” both women say in unison.

As they look at each other in quiet terror and confusion, I lean down and say, “No I’m not your sister’s boyfriend but I might like to be. Is that ok with you? I’m Malykai by the way.” Letting my hand hover in the air between us I smile. The girl looks at my hand and back into my face before she smiles and reaches behind her with her left hand while grasping mine with her right. Before she can say or do anything, I ask, “Do you know the best way to stop bullies from bullying you?” I notice a shine in her eyes as she pulls her left hand around quickly with a small needle. As she pricks my hand just in-between my thumb and pointer finger with the needle, I smile bigger, mostly to cover my wince, and continue, “It’s to show that you don’t care what they do or say to you because you’re bigger than they are.”

The surprise in her eyes told me she wasn’t expecting this response. Qhullani and Ellie both just watch what’s happening with their mouths hanging open. As I release the girl’s hand, she pulls away slowly looking a little scared before Qhullani steps forward, “What’s the matter Zolani? Introduce yourself. What’s that in your hand?”

“Nothing!” with her voice slightly higher in pitch than I’m sure she meant to have it, Qhullani steps forward and plucks the needle from her hand.

“So, is this why any guy I’ve ever introduced to you has never stuck around?”

“I’m sorry,” Zolani says, keeping her eyes on me. “He’s different. It’s kind of scary.”

“Yes, he is different, thank you for noticing. Now we are going to go dance some more ok?”

Zolani only nods her head as Qhullani grabs my arm and tugs me toward the other entrance of the snack room. Finding a trash can, she throws the needle into it and sighs.

Standing behind her I say, “I don’t think your sister likes me very much.” I grab her shoulders gently before she pulls out of my hands and spins around.

I can’t believe she would do something like that! I’m so sorry, let me see your hand,” reaching down to grab my hand she examines the puncture mark before looking back at me. “Didn’t it hurt? You didn’t say anything.”

“It hurt a little bit but not enough to make a big deal over. Unless of course it means you’ll pay this much attention to me and stop worrying about things that can’t be changed?”

“Oh stop, be nice. What did you say to her to make her so scared?”

“I told her the best way to get bullies to stop.”

Her eyebrows went up, “You did? What did you say? And why did she seem so frightened?”

“Because I said not to let anything, they do affect you just as she stuck me with the needle. The look of surprise on her face when I smiled at her instead of crying out in pain was amazing. And what was that bit about me being different? All the other guys scream or something?”

“Something like that,” she sighs. “I never could introduce her to anyone I liked. Eventually the rumor that I had a demonic little sister got out and no one wanted to meet the rest of my family. I always told my father it was because he’s a higher up in the Collective and everyone was afraid of him.”

“To protect your sister?” At her nod I continue, “Well you must have been a hell of a sister for her to want to protect you like that.”

“Protect me,” she repeated the words with scorn. “Protect me from what? From having a life outside the family? From hanging out with people I like? From-”

“From people that can’t hold their own against you.” At her quizzical look I laugh a little, “Anyone that can’t help you don’t need to be around you. Anyone that can bring you short of your full potential doesn’t need to hang around. I’m sure that’s what she was doing. Weeding out all the weaklings. Did anyone stick around after meeting her?” A scuffling noise from behind me catches my attention. _I’ll have to be careful._

“Yeah a few but-”

“Well then they must have been deemed worthy by the almighty Demon Sister, ha-ha.” The look on Qhullani’s face is so funny I can’t help but start laughing.

“Don’t laugh at my sister jerk! She doesn’t deserve to be laughed at!” The voice came from behind me.

_I thought I heard someone walking up. I guess it was only the little one._

Glancing over my shoulder at Zolani, I say, “Hey Lani, I wasn’t laughing at her. I was laughing at your nickname.”

“I hate that nickname,” she walks up next to me. Just higher than a mumble she says, “Sorry about your hand.”

“Huh? Oh, that’s right the needle. So, what’s up, little one? Need something?”

The curious look on Zolani’s face told me she wasn’t sure if she could believe I had forgotten about what happened. Instead of voicing this however, she echoes me, “Little one? I’m not that little.”

“Ha-ha you’re right, I’m sorry. Although my question still stands, need something? Got tired of bullying others for a change?”

“Shut up, no I haven’t. I’m just bored of standing around waiting for Dad to finish talking to people.”

“Well make sure you check in with him every few minutes still, Lani,” Qhullani chimes in. “You wouldn’t want him to send the entire army to find you right?”

As I look over at her I see a bit of a blush under her mask, so I say, “Speaking from experience?”

The red only deepened and Lani starts laughing, “Is she ever! Oh, my galaxies, she snuck off the ship once to visit a boy and when Dad found out he-”

“Ok that’s enough from the little one I think!” Stepping forward Qhullani puts a hand over her sister’s mouth. “Seriously, no more.”

Lani’s response, muffled as it was, sounds like an agreement so the hand was removed. “Shesh, were you trying to kill me? Anyway, who did Aunt Ellie bring?”

“Jason,” I offer. “I think they make a good couple. Have you met him yet?”

“Oh Jason! Yes, I like him, he’s really nice. That’s a good match that I wish I had come up with.”

“Hey, isn’t it about time for you to go check in?” Qhullani says.

Lani gives a heavy sigh and looks at her sister intently. “I guess I can go check in again, but I want to grab a drink first.” And with that she turns and strides over to the end of the buffet table where drinks are laid out.

Watching her walk away, I get the feeling it’s not going to be the last time I have to deal with her. “What kind of drinks do they have?” I call out to her.

“They’ve got some Go Check for Yourself, some I’m Not Telling Yous and some really yummy Don’t Be Lazies. You know the usual.”

I start laughing. “That was funny,” I say to Qhullani. “Your sister is skilled in the art of verbal warfare. Ha-ha, are you thirsty?”

She laughs a little and rolls her eyes, “Sure let’s go but if it’s only to make sure she goes to my father, you’ll regret it.” With a devilish look she starts walking after her sister.

_Oh, I believe it._

As we walk toward the drinks, someone steps in front of us for a moment, looks at us and growls, “Oh sorry.”

I smile as I pull Qhullani to the left, stepping around him and notice Zolani is no longer in front of us.

“Now where did she go?” Qhullani says with exasperation.

I look around but she’s nowhere to be seen. Even the guy who walked in front of us is no longer visible.

“Zolani? Where are you?”

_Qhullani is nervous._

“You ok?”

“She normally would have jumped out at me by now. Rycon I don’t see her anywhere.”

“Ok go check the bathroom and if she’s not there find your dad.”

“Where are you going?”

“I’m going to check the door.” Without waiting for a response, I start speed walking through the dining hall towards the front of the masquerade.

As the front door comes into view, I see a man practically dragging someone about half his size with one arm around the other’s shoulders.

Running now, I get to the door just as it’s closing. Stepping through the big doors I scan the area to see a young girl being dragged off by the wrist.

“No! Let me go! What do you want?”

“Shut up,” the man says in a quieter voice.

I start to run after them. The man must have heard my footfalls, turns to look at me and curses. Pulling Zolani in front of himself, he stops and says, “Don’t come any closer.”

Slowing my run to a steady walk, I put my hands in the air and say, “What are you doing?” As the guy opens his mouth to speak, I continue, “I mean really what are you doing letting a guy like him kidnap you?”

Both the man and Zolani look surprised. Before she could answer the guy, jumps in, “Who the hell do you think you are? Trying to be a hero is just going to get her killed.”

The look of horror on the little girl’s face is heartbreaking. “Ok.”

The guy hesitates a moment before taking a knife and putting it up to her neck, “I mean it, don’t get in my way or she dies.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. I thought you meant that she would die if I took her back inside. Which she might when her sister and dad see her. But I guess you were meaning _you’d_ kill her huh?”

“What the hell are you talking about? Get back or I’ll-”

“If you’re going to do it then do it. Threats only go so far.”

Zolani’s expression turned to pure terror. The man presses the knife into her skin before growling. Pushing her to the side, he charges me, closing the gap between us in a matter of seconds.

As he moves toward me, I smile, making him falter. He throws his hand with the knife at me and I push his wrist aside and elbow him in the jaw in the same motion.

“Ah! Why you…”

“You didn’t actually think I was going to just stand here and let you stab me, did you?”

“You’re a dead man,” he yells as he stabs at me again. I grab his wrist, step sideways and twist his arm while pushing down on his shoulder. He falls face first screaming.

Holding his wrist and keeping pressure on his shoulder and look over at Zolani and say, “You ok?”

Still laying on the ground where she fell, she looks up at me and gets angry, “You told him to kill me!”

“Which he didn’t do. He wasn’t going to either. I had to get him to let go off you and come after me so you wouldn’t be in danger of being stabbed.”

“Zolani!” several people say at the same time and run from the doors of the masquerade towards us.

“Sis!” Zolani gets up and runs to meet the group of people.

Looking over at them I see Qhullani and her dad followed by Ellie, Jason and several armed people.

“What the hell happened, Malykai?” Qhullani’s dad asks as he hugs his daughters.

Seeing Jason and Ellie about to ask something I quickly say, “This guy was trying to kidnap Zolani. I got to them before they could go very far but only managed to-”

Two of the armed soldiers grab me and throw me to the ground on my back while another points his gun at me. “Don’t move!” The other two kneel on my shoulders and chest to keep me from moving.

I thought I saw stars after they threw me to the ground but now, I see a lot of stars as one presses on my ribs. Gasping from the pain, I feel so lightheaded.

“No stop! He saved me! The guy he was holding on the ground is the one who grabbed me!” I hear Zolani defending me as I try to catch my breath.

“Watch out!” Ellie says. “He’s got a knife!”

The soldier pointing his gun at my face turns to look at the guy I had on the ground, “Drop it now! This is your only warning!”

A small clatter and then I see Qhullani kneeling next to me. “Are you ok? Let go of him!” Gasping I nod and try to smile. “Is it your ribs again?”

I take a shallow breath and try to sit up but fall short, all the way back down to the ground. _I hate this pain! I can’t do anything but lay here._ Suddenly another figure is kneeling next to me.

Jason puts his hand on my head and turns to Qhullani, “Can we move him?”

“As long as we’re careful he should be fine. I’m not sure if his ribs broke again or not. Hopefully it’s just the bruise and residual pain that’s the issue. Hey,” she says looking into my eyes, “I need you to try and stand, ok? If you can’t then we will figure something else out.”

“I’ll be fine to walk. Just need to catch my breath,” I groan out of gritted teeth. _Damn this pain._

“Ok, try not to bend him at the waist. Ready?”

I nod slightly and then, “Let’s do it quickly.”

“Alright. Go.”

_Should’ve gone slower. Oh well, too late now._

Once in a standing position, I hold tight to Jason and Qhullani. As my head and vision clears, I see Zolani crying just before she runs to me and hugs me so tight the stars come back. “Ooph.”

“Thank you so much, Malykai! Thank you for saving me.”

“Don’t mention it. It was nothing.”

“Nothing?” Ellie exclaims. “Nothing would have been walking her to the bathroom and back again! What you did was so much more.”

Patting Zolani’s head, I grunt softly. She lets go as fast as she grabbed on. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it, really. I’m just glad you’re safe. I think it’s time for me to go and lay down though.”

From behind Zolani, Commander Sabien steps up and reaches out his hand, “Thank you for saving her, Malykai. Please, if there is anything I can do, let me know.”

“Of course, Sir, thank you. Right now, I think I just need to lay down though.”

“Yes of course. Here Qhullani, let me help. Jason and I will walk him to your ship. Zolani, please stay next to your sister,” the commander says as he steps next to me and puts my arm over his shoulder. “He looks like he took a beating.”

“Careful of his ribs, they were broken not long ago,” Qhullani says stepping out of the way.

“Sir that’s not necessary, you don’t have to hold me up,” I say while trying to pull my arm off his shoulder.

“Nonsense, it’s the least I could do. You save my daughter after all and you seem to have caught the eye of my other daughter.”

“Dad!”

“Ha-ha I’m sorry but it’s kind of hard to miss. Well shall we be off? After you please, Qhullani. This time, I will keep my eye on both of my daughters while we walk.”

“Oh, I just remembered,” I say. “Did you go and get your mask fixed?”

“Thinking about others before yourself. Now I see why Qhullani likes you-”

“Dad seriously?”

“Yes, I did, and I must say, they did an excellent job of it too. It feels better than it has in years,” the Commander smiles as he speaks. “I’m glad for it too since my late wife made it by hand for me many years ago.”

“I’m happy to hear he could fix it.”

While we walk the others exchange some small talk, but I couldn’t pay attention to any of it. The pain in my ribs and head keep me from doing much more than walking and breathing. We walked for what seemed to be an excruciatingly long time, until I hear, “Here we are. Thanks again dad. Hey, you need to stay awake!”

Being shaken makes me realize my eyes are closed, “Sorry, I was just concentrating on walking.” I look into Qhullani’s worried eyes. “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to scare you, I’m just a bit dizzier than I thought.”

“Great. Those guards really did a number on you, huh?”

“Had I realized they were going to do that I could have stopped them, but I didn’t know they thought I was the bad guy.”

“They probably would have shot you if you resisted anyway.” I notice her turn to my left to look at her dad. She asks him, “Why did they attack him anyways?”

“Because the man who tried to kidnap Zoe is an officer.”

“What?” everyone says in unison. I tried but only managed a strangled gasp.

“I don’t know why but it seems a member of the council wants me to back off.”

“Are you kidding me? My sister was almost kidnapped because of a council member? Why? What do they have to gain?”

“I’m not sure yet but they may have something to do with that Rycon person.”

My brain sharpens slightly at the mention of my name. _What is he talking about?_

“Rycon? What does he have to do with Zolani getting kidnapped?”

“I thought this council member was the reason he was able to escape all the time and wreak so much havoc. Since Rycon died I can’t ask him about his connection.”

Through my haze I feel gazes on me just before I start to fall to my knees.

***


	11. Back Again

***

My eyes open to a familiar sight; the bright white light of the medical room. Tentatively I lift my left hand to my head and my right to my ribs. I can feel a bandage wrapped around my head. Groaning I try to sit up but can only manage a few inches before lightheadedness takes over, forcing me to lay back again.

“You’re finally awake.” I look to my left to see Zolani standing next to me. She puts her hand on my arm, “I’m so happy you finally woke up. Qhullani has been sick with worry.”

My mouth feels dry. “How are you doing? How’s your neck?” I ask as clearly as I can.

Tears start to show in her eyes as she answers, “I’m fine thanks to you.” She looks away quickly.

“What’s wrong Lani?”

“Is it true?” She takes a minute to swallow and look into my eyes before, “Is it true your name is Rycon?”

_Oh crap. How did she find out?_

“Yes, it is.” The hurt look on her face as she steps back breaks my heart, so I close my eyes. Suddenly I feel something brushing against the side of my face. Opening my eyes again I see Zolani wiping away a tear I hadn’t noticed sliding down my cheek.

“No, you’re not.” The conviction in her voice has me wondering how bad my head injury must have been. “Rycon is a monster, someone who kills because he like to. You’re Malykai, a man who goes out of his way to save people no matter what they are to him.”

I close my eyes and breathe deeply before opening them again to look at her again. “How long have you known?”

“I’ve known who you are since you saved my life. No monster can do what you did unless they truly are good.”

“Ha, you know what I meant. How long have you known my real name?”

“A day or so. I overheard my sister and aunt talking to Jason about you. Why did you use his brother’s name?”

“It was the only name that came to mind. Malykai was the true hero.”

“What do you mean?”

“Zoe! What are you doing in here? Oh, my galaxies are you awake, Ry- Malykai?”

“Yep and I feel terrible. I made a mess of the rest of your night, didn’t I? I’ll make it up to you I promise.”

“Still thinking of others, I see. I’m glad that injury didn’t take that away,” Qhullani says gently.

“I see, or rather, I feel that I’m not strapped to the bed again. Does that mean your dad doesn’t know who I am?”

“Yes, their father did find out who you are,” the booming voice could only belong to one person, Commander Sabien.

“Dad!” both girls scream.

“Dad I can explain!” Qhullani screeches. “I… He… What I mean is-”

“No more lies, Qhullani. He is the most wanted criminal in the entire galaxy!”

“Yes but-”

“But nothing! Will you lie to my face now that I have found out the truth with my own ears?”

“No Father I can’t do that. If you’ll just hear me out-”

“There is nothing to hear this man- this criminal, is not who he says he is!”

“What?” the girls and I all say together.

“This man, as Zolani has so elegantly stated, cannot be the monster known as Rycon. No monster could have done what he has done. From what I heard, he stood up in front of many soldiers to deny the claims against him and never once wavered. He gained your trust so strongly that you even took him off the ship into a very public place where he could have run away, never to be heard from again. Then there’s the fact that no monster could save someone he doesn’t even know. This is not the Rycon I and the rest of the collective has been searching for during these last five years.”

“Dad…”

“I do have one thing to ask however.”

As he comes into view, I look him in the eyes as best I can while the girls stand between us like they hope to shield me from him. “Ask away, Sir.”

The look on the commander’s face seems amused, “How the hell have you managed to not get caught or killed for so long?”

The question surprises me so much that I laugh uncontrollably for about a minute. Getting myself under control again, I say, “It wasn’t easy I’ll tell you that. So many times, I thought I was a dead man but managed to get through the lines of soldiers. Honestly, I have no idea how I survived this long, Sir.”

The commander just nods with a, “Hmm,” and walks out of the room. I look at Qhullani who seems nervous. She grabs my hand and gives it a quick squeeze before walking behind her father. Zoe just pulls her chair closer and sits down, waiting and seeming to prepare for a bad ending to this event.

“Stay with him,” Qhullani says to her sister before following the commander out of the room.

***


	12. You're Leaving Her?

***

_Zolani looks worried even while she’s sleeping._

As she tosses from one side of the chair to the other, the blanket Qhullani brought and put over her starts sliding down onto the floor. I sit up to move it back on top of her as a wave of dizziness hits me and I have to stop for a moment, closing my eyes. When I regain my balance, I open my eyes and fix the blanket. Noticing that a lock of her hair seems to be bothering her I move it out of her face.

As I sit back on the bed again, a shuffling noise makes me look at the door to find Sabien watching. I try to stand back up, but he waves me down again.

“I meant what I said before,” he says walking over and leaning on the bed next to me.

“Sir?”

“You are not a monster if you can save someone that means nothing to you. My daughter always had a soft spot for the bad boys but when push came to shove it was the one with the biggest heart that she hung out with. You must have proven yourself to her somehow if she would go to such lengths to protect you.”

Not knowing what to say, I stay silent. The only thing going through my head is that now, it seems, two commanders believe I’m not the monster from the stories.

“I am curious though,” he continues after a few moments of silence. “If you weren’t working with anyone, then how in the galaxy’s name did you survive all this time?”

I quietly chuckle a little bit before saying, “There were some people who believed my story and hated the Collective enough to help me. There were others who lied to me to try and get my bounty and still others that didn’t ask questions but helped anyone in need. To answer your question the best I can, Sir, I got lucky every minute of every day until recently. My luck ran out when I tried to get some sleep in an abandoned building. That’s where Commander Ellie found me, and this is where I ended up.”

“A prisoner.”

“I wouldn’t say I’m a prisoner, or at least not entirely. More like a respected and guarded, guest. Most of the people on this ship have gotten to know me one way or another.”

“Such as the injured soldiers who spoke very highly of you.”

“I doubt that very much but perhaps the one who hit me might see me for who I really am.”

“You sell yourself short. All of them spoke of your conviction and desire to prove your innocence. The fact that even while on the ground being kicked and beaten you refused to call out for help and never changed your story or backed down showed them how serious you were to have them believe you. Although I did hear that my daughter had some part in that as well.”

“Yes, she has been very kind to me. I have no idea how I’m going to repay her for everything she’s done for me.”

“What makes you think she wants you to repay her?” turning to me the commander gives me a quizzical look.

Looking at him with a feeling of disbelief, I turn back to watch Zolani sleep for a few more seconds before saying, “I don’t. I just know she has done so much for me and I need to give something back. For one, she kept me alive. For two she kept me healthy. And three she gave me the chance to have fun at the masquerade.”

Just as Zolani begins to stir, he says, “I think it’s about time for us to part ways.” I look at him quickly before he continues, “I think it may be better if she stays with you.” Nodding toward his daughter he looks at me with a smile. “Mainly because I think she will find a way to end up on this ship and also because I think she will be safer here than with me.”

“Are you sure, sir? That’s quite the step to take. I mean, yes, her sister is here, and Ellie will of course do her best to keep her safe, but do you really want to part with her?”

“Want to? No of course not. To keep her safe however I must accept all ideas, and this came from someone I trust with my life. So, because she was almost kidnapped and it seems it was ordered by someone in the government, the safest thing to do is to make them unsure of where to strike next.” He rubs his inch-long beard for a moment. “Also, you are here.”

I give him a disbelieving smile, looking at his expression. 

_He must be joking._

“Me? Ha-ha, why would I make any difference? I’m technically a prisoner and the supposedly dead most wanted and hated criminal in the galaxy, so what could possibly lead you to believe I can do anything for her?”

Turning slowly to look at me, he stands up and puts a hand on my shoulder, “Because you have the desire to make things right.” As I start laughing at his strange and cryptic words, he continues, “And because you have something to prove. Last but certainly not least, you feel you owe Qhullani something, right?”

I stop laughing to look at his now serious face. “Well yes of course but-”

“Then it’s settled.” Clapping his hand on my shoulder he turns toward the door, “I will speak to you another time. Remember Rycon, I’m counting on you most of all to keep her safe.”

Dumbfounded I try to say something, anything, but the only thing I can manage is, “S-sir?” Before I know it, he’s gone through the door which closes behind him quietly.

_What the hell just happened? How did I get roped into this?_

Looking back at Zolani I find her looking at me with tired bleary eyes. “Hey Zo, how ya doin?”

With a yawn she answers, “Good. Where’s everyone?”

“I’m not sure. Your dad just left though. I guess you’ll be staying here with us for a while.”

At that, her eyes open wide and she jumps up. “Yes! I get to hang out with Sis and Aunty Ellie!” she says. Throwing her arms around me and squeezing tight, she adds, “I’m going to go find everyone.”

Just as she reaches the door, it opens and Ellie walks in, face red and a frown on her face, “Did you really offer for- oh Zolani you’re awake and here? What are you doing here?”

“I fell asleep in the chair. Anyway, Aunty Ellie did you hear? I get to stay with you for a while!”

“Oh yes I did,” she glares at me. “Why don’t you go find Qhullani and let her know ok?”

“You got it!”

As the door closes again Ellie’s frown returns, “Did you really offer to watch Zolani? I mean, Rycon, really. What were you thinking? We are trying to figure out who is behind your framing and now we must figure out who is trying to kidnap Zolani. I don’t think offering to keep her here was a very good idea. Not to mention, it wasn’t your decision to make in the first place!”

“I honestly had no part in that. He had his mind made up, so after he told me what he wanted, I said, ‘Are you sure?’ and he must have taken that as an ok. I don’t know how he came to that conclusion, but he said someone he trusts came up with this plan to keep her safe.” I raise my hands in a, ‘I don’t have anything gesture,’ while speaking.

After a few more seconds of her glaring at me, she turns with a, “Hmph,” and walks out of the room.

_Oh boy, I really hope this will work out. Just in case it doesn’t though, I’m going to catch up on my sleep before it blows up._

“Rycon!”

_Damn, so much for that. Almost made it too._

“Yes?” Instead of laying down I stand up and walk to the door. Looking left then right I see Qhullani walking towards me.

“Oh, there you are. We’re leaving the station now and I just wanted to check in on you. How’re you feeling?”

“Better than the first time I woke up here, ha-ha.” At her questioning look I add, “Because I didn’t blind myself this time. Oh, and, because this time I wasn’t tied to the bed.”

“Ha-ha, well I’m glad you’re feeling better. Would you like to watch the station disappear?”

I pretend to think for a moment, “Well it would be nice to watch but it would be better to have someone with me.”

Her smile fades and her mouth opens slightly. “Well,” she says quietly, “I mean I would like to watch also, if that’s ok with you.”

“Well good. It’s a date then. So where are we heading?”

The look of shock on her face makes me start laughing. She recovers enough to say. “Well I suppose, yes. It’s a date then. Our first-”

“Our second date,” I correct her. When she looks at me funny, I laugh and continue, “The first was the masquerade.”

“Oh, I didn’t even think about that as a date!”

I put a look of shock on my face, “But you kissed me!”

Her face turns bright red, “I did no-”

“Yes, you did. You kissed my cheek,” I lean closer, expecting her to try and deny it.

“Oh, you _are_ bad. I have to watch myself around you, don’t I?” she smiles.

“Oh, I don’t think you _have_ to. I see that more as an optional thing. So, shall we go? We’re leaving soon right? Which way?” I smile mischievously at her and put out my elbow expectantly.

As she wraps her arm into mine, she laughs, “So bad and yet, so good.”

End Part One

***

**Author's Note:**

> So I have worked on the whole piece for the better part of 4 months. It is still very new and I'd like to hear what everyone thinks. Thanks for reading


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